My Goals, My Dreams...I Need You Advice.

[Maximus]

This will be long, but bare with me. I need you advice and I need to explain everything so I can get the best advice.

OK now my dream is to compete as a gymnast. I never wanted to be one because I never knew what it was. I only found out a last year during mid of winter/spring season. Then after seeing the 08 Beijing Olympics I was really excited to do this. But when I entered my Freshmen year at high school I found out that there was only Girls' Gymnastic. So I got pushed into wrestling and just lifting weights. So during November of 08 I signed up under a contract for a gym membership. I liked it at first but then it became a hassle and a annoyance. My family worked long hours 20+ a day! I am not joking! But how they got there is another story. I will include it if you guys want but I don't want to make this any longer.


Anyways back to my story. So it became a hassle to get my dad to drive all the way from his work to pick me up and drop me off at the gym and then he drives all the way back and when I'm done I'll have to wait until he comes back when I am done which gets boring waiting for him. So now I still got 2 more months of the contract after August is over. But I am afraid to ask my parents to let me do gymnastics. I am 16 now it may be too late for me to compete in the Olympics but I have got a passion for this sport. I am willing to work so hard that I may even be able to get to Olympian level.

But it is not offered at my new school either. They only got a girl's team. We have to drive all the way for 24 miles to get there. Don't know if that is the same distance for my dad to come and get me and get me to the gym this year. But we move closer to his work now. See what I am saying. I care about my parents so much that I am counting distances and time to make sure they have it easy. I get so stressed. But I also want to do this. I never get to do anything good and extraordinary. I want to become more then just going through school everyday and having to worry about grades and girls.

What am I to do? Should I forget about it?

[Maximus]

Also some things I want to add. We also just moved. Buying lots of expensive good quality furniture and backyard stuff (Lawn mowers, blowers, etc.) And we just signed up for Verizon Fios which is like 119.00 a month but it came with a free mini netbook but shipping cost 50. I am afraid that asking for gymnastics class and driving me there everyday from school may be too much. But I really want to do this and eventually compete in the Juniors team. What should I do? What can I do?

[Maximus]

Anyone?

[NightRose]

(I apologize for not answering sooner. I saw this post and was going to reply, then got sidetracked.)

I say...this is your dream in life, and that is something you should never give up on. It's also something you're going to have to work for. Life dreams aren't easy, and you're seeing that firsthand. You are the one that must find a way to make this work, and I challenge you to never give up on it.

First off, is there a way you can help fund gymnastic classes and costs of travel? At 16, finding a part-time job could be tough, but even helping out your neighbors with house or yard work could bring in some money to help you take these classes. Also, is it possible to find other ways to get to class? Maybe a bus (or subway, if you live in a major city)? Or befriending someone else in your gym class and trade off carpooling? There are lots of options for you here.

Most importantly, I say, don't give up on this. It sounds like something you are very passionate about, and I'd hate to see that fade away. It might take a lot of hard work to make it happen, but it sounds like you're dedicated. I wish you the best of luck.

[Starwitch Stone]

Since you PM'd me to ask for my opinion, here it is. I realize it won't be the popular opinion especially after NightRose offered such an inspiring answer.

I don't want to be the person to crush your dream, but if you're already 16 years old and you're just now getting started, it seems unlikely that you'll be an Olympic gymnast. Why not just do it for your own pleasure if you enjoy it?

From http://gymnastics.about.com/od/majorcom ... pics_4.htm:

Most Olympic gymnasts train around 40 hours a week to reach the highest level of the sport.

You pretty much have to train for the Olympics like it's a full-time job, and most Olympians start training at an early age. (In China, it's their whole life and they are removed from their home to live in a full-time training facility.) If you're having trouble getting a ride to gymnastics once a week, I don't see you being able to train for 40 hours a week. It's good of you to think of your parents and the trouble they have to go to. A lot of kids never consider their parents needs and desires. It's all about me, me, me.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Bright Blessings,

[Maximus]

Well the thing about me is whatever I commit to I always want to outdo. If it is yard work I want to make sure the grass is cut clean and green and full and healthy watered and everything, if it is laundry I want to make sure everyone's clothes are in the basket before I go do the laundry, if its meditation I want my mind to be absolutely quiet or I'll go nuts! If it's work I have got this instinct that I HAVE to do a good honest job. So you get the idea. I dunno it's just the way I am.

But you know I was never fortunate enough to be trained as a kid. I asked my mom why they never got me into gymnastics. She said I might have never even liked it. My parents opened their store right after I was born. I was raised by many good customers and eventually my grand parents back in China.

I also have my basic foundation. It's not like I'm not prepared in any way. I start working out seriously to loose a bit of fat to get a six pack. That goal turned into fitness goals. I started doing body weight things like push ups variations, pull ups variations, squats variation and full out springing drills.

Right now I have gotten a few information off the web and started some home training at my house doing hand stands, planche progressions and front lever progressions.

SO I've got my basic foundation and strength. All I need now is to learn the skill. I am also fit for gymnastics. I have an advantage. I am a small guy. I am 5'3" and my lowest and best weight was about 120lb. to 125lb. Will I ever make it into the Olympics. I have no plans seriously as of yet. I am still in school. And not ready for that much pressure. And also daydreaming about being the in Olympics is the best Fantasy I have! But right now I am young and hard working and just want to have fun in life. Cause I think Gymnastics give me a purpose in life, a goal and challenge to achieve. I feel very bad and depress as of today because gymnastics is something I really want to do. It is my love. [/b]

[NightRose]

Whether you make it to the Olympics or not, if it's your dream to do something with gymnastics, go for it! The Olympics isn't the only competition out there, and there are other things you can do with gymnastics. What I'm hearing from you is that the Olympics would be great, but it's really about the gymnastics. That's what you love, and want to continue, even if you have no chance of making it to the Olympics. And if so, I say go for it. Yes, the reality is that Olympics is the best of the best, and a LOT of people go for it...few make it. But if you love the sport for the sport, regardless of where it goes, I see no reason to give up on it.

Oh, and I'd like to add this story. It's an old one from Chicken Soup, but I feel like it applies here:
http://www.connectingus.co.za/resources ... k-canfield

[Maximus]

First thank you both for putting so much thought into you advice. I greatly appreciate it.

I also want to mention that I would have searched a spell for this but I don't know what is good for this situation and my interest have gotten back on the Law of Attraction again after seeing has implement this Philosophy as well.

I got the book the Secret back in 08. I read some chapters and I loved it so I had to get it. I read the chapter but I did not understand most of it as I forget most of the stories they set as an example. But back then I was not that mature and I just wanted the "material world".

But now I am back I find it real hard to stay positive all the time.

For example today started out great. I will get my uniform at the ROTC office and then get the Verizon FiOS at our new house. But then everything change. I was sick today because I was too scare to ask my mom about my Gymnastic as I see my father was busy and everything. It's kinda like when you had a crush back in high school and you tell yourself I am going to talk to him/her and then right when he/she is there you changed the subject. And afterwards you hate yourself for not taking the opportunity. Doesn't ring a bell? Oh well maybe that's just me LOL But anyways. Then when we got to our new home we found out our AC was broken. And we don't know what is wrong. I was so pissed man.... I went awalled ! So my whole day has been pretty stressful. It's hard to change your thought cause when you get mad and stressed out there is like nothing that seems good. I mean I can think about Disney land but I am still mad and stressed.

Personally I am get mad fast. Anything small will tick me. But I am also a clam person too. I get I dunno I guess mood swings. I get that from my Mom. I like to get things done fast and if anything does go good I get super pissed. Now my dad is the opposite. Very slow and taking all day. My mom would yell at him all day. He sometimes make me go crazy too.

So anyway do you think the Law of Attraction will work for me? I mean it saids that it works always every second 24/7 whether you believe it or not. you had a great experience and life changing events from following the Law. Do you have any advice to make this all simple?

[Starwitch Stone]

Do you have any advice to make this all simple?

The thing I've noticed about the Law of Attraction and spellwork is that the younger a person is, the more likely they seem to be to ask for goals that may be unattainable. Young people sometimes tend to think in magical ways, like anything they want can just happen, and that it should happen merely because they want it to. When they hear about the Law of Attraction or magic, they sometimes go overboard, desiring major life changes that really aren't practical for the life they and their family lead.

When my step-daughter watched The Secret she began visualizing owning horses. She wanted to have a black horse and a white horse. It didn't matter that we lived in a regular neighborhood and had no room for a horse or that her father was allergic to horses and I didn't care for them. Didn't matter that having a horse is a huge responsibility that is expensive and time-consuming. She wanted horses. She would draw pictures of them, imagine herself having horses, etc. Of course, she never got a horse. It's been a few years and she's mostly forgotten about it now, but I kind of regretted teaching her about The Law of Attraction in the way that we did. Even though I do think that the law of attraction should be taught to children, I don't know if they are mature enough to always set their own goals without guidance from adults. The Secret really seems to be geared more towards adults because their goals are usually more attainable. To use the secret, you have to learn to discipline your mind. Some people are naturals at it, but most of us aren't.

It's hard for me to give you a simple answer on this topic. It seems like the Law of Attraction can work wonders at times, but I'm worried that children and teens get their hopes up too high, wishing for things that really aren't possible. Then they may decide that the Law of Attraction doesn't work at all since it didn't work for that particular goal. I wouldn't want to see that happen.

Maybe you can be a famous gymnast. I really don't know. I just think of all the young people on American Idol who want to be famous and how the vast majority of them don't get to be. But maybe if you're using The Secret you'll have better luck than most. No one really knows what the future holds for you.

I just read that Chicken Soup story. I can't believe it was about horses, lol. That's funny. It was a good story.

Don't let me be your "dream-stealer" like the story said. Even if the Olympics is out of reach (and who knows, maybe it's not), you can do like NightRose said and find another way to be involved in gymnastics. What about The Cirque de Soleil or one of those kinds of shows? You might not be "Olympic" famous, but you'd be on stage and people would definitely admire you and ask you for your autograph and picture. Or you could teach gymnastics to children. If this is truly your dream, I'm sure you can find a way to be involved with gymnastics in a professional sense. I'm not as confident about your wanting to be in the Olympics, but it's not my dream to pursue. I don't want to push you in a direction that's going to drive you and your family crazy but at the same time I don't want to destroy your dream. So why don't you take a look at the situation objectively, read up about Olympic gymnasts and how long they train and make a decision about whether you think it's worth pursuing? That's really the only thing you can do that will satisfy your mind and give you an answer that works. Also, ask your parents about it. If they say no then you have your answer. If they say yes, you can go from there.

Bright Blessings,

[Maximus]

Thank you guys so so much for you great advice I can't show you how much I appreciate this.

[rainysoul]

I actually don't like the Secret. I believe there is some truth to attraction, because we're all connected, but if its a law, it can't be 1/2 way. Like gravity, it doesn't work just sometimes, or just for people who believe in it. I own the book, and they don't talk about limits. The focus a lot on material possessions, they blame the victim, and they don't talk much about consequences. Like I can focus all my energy on getting $100,000...and I get it. Of course it was an insurance settlement, after my dad was killed in a car wreck 2 weeks after I started "attracting" the money.

I'd recommend reading "The Think Big Manifesto". Its an awesome book, talks a lot about altering your thinking, and working on learning to think big.

About the gymnastics, that's a tough question. I'd say try it, who knows, but be open minded. You might not like it, and you've really set it up on this high pedestal. You can't love it if you've never done it...reading about it, dreaming about it, watching it...nothing is the same as doing. So just keep in mind a plan for what if you don't like it, and pay attention for what else is going on that you might not have learned if you hadn't tried.

Good luck and happy thoughts!

[hcfp]

This will be long, but bare with me. I need you advice and I need to explain everything so I can get the best advice.

OK now my dream is to compete as a gymnast. I never wanted to be one because I never knew what it was. I only found out a last year during mid of winter/spring season. Then after seeing the 08 Beijing Olympics I was really excited to do this. But when I entered my Freshmen year at high school I found out that there was only Girls' Gymnastic. So I got pushed into wrestling and just lifting weights. So during November of 08 I signed up under a contract for a gym membership. I liked it at first but then it became a hassle and a annoyance. My family worked long hours 20+ a day! I am not joking! But how they got there is another story. I will include it if you guys want but I don't want to make this any longer.


Anyways back to my story. So it became a hassle to get my dad to drive all the way from his work to pick me up and drop me off at the gym and then he drives all the way back and when I'm done I'll have to wait until he comes back when I am done which gets boring waiting for him. So now I still got 2 more months of the contract after August is over. But I am afraid to ask my parents to let me do gymnastics. I am 16 now it may be too late for me to compete in the Olympics but I have got a passion for this sport. I am willing to work so hard that I may even be able to get to Olympian level.

But it is not offered at my new school either. They only got a girl's team. We have to drive all the way for 24 miles to get there. Don't know if that is the same distance for my dad to come and get me and get me to the gym this year. But we move closer to his work now. See what I am saying. I care about my parents so much that I am counting distances and time to make sure they have it easy. I get so stressed. But I also want to do this. I never get to do anything good and extraordinary. I want to become more then just going through school everyday and having to worry about grades and girls.

What am I to do? Should I forget about it?

You should open up to your parents about your aspiration to become a gymnast. They will definitely be proud of you because you want to accomplish something for yourself. Every parents are suppose to encourage and support their child/children in whatever endeavor they wish to embark. Though there will be some compromise but hey that's what's family for.

[Maximus]

Thanks for the support you guys! I am finally feeling the momentum to push this forward to making it happen!

[Greymalkin]

Good for you!

As somebody more intelligent that I once said; "You will always regret the things you DIDN'T do, not the things you DID do".

[solexowenus]

Tell me, do not give up on the matter. It seems that something that is very passionate and I'd like to see vanish. This can take a lot of hard work to get there, but it seems it is dedicated. I wish him well.