Help on telling the parents

Teenagers are a special bunch with concerns different than adults. Teens can chat with each other here and learn from one another.
Post Reply
Gaia

Help on telling the parents

Post by Gaia »

Well, as I said before, I’ve told my two sisters and my mom about me being a Witch. Though they find it cool and strange at the same time, I’m happy to say that it's going great. Of course, now comes the problem of telling my step dad: a heavy southern catholic man. He and his family are very, shall I say, traditional. I feel so awkward there, I’m always getting these “you can never be yourself around them because that would displease them” kind of vibes. I do not think I am currently prepared and ready to tell my step dad (who will no doubt tell his family), but may I ask how I can tell him or do something that will ease the shock? Yes, I’m a teenager, I will not pretend like I know everything, so I come to you all in my time of help before I face the Discussion. What should I do :( ? What if he thinks i'm a freak? What if he tells one of his buddies and they tell their kid or something and the people at my school find out (though unlikely, but then again, my town is small and everyone is gossip freaks)? Not in a self-centered way, I'll admit that i'm a very strong and just person, but there's only so much cold shoulder and insults a Witch can take.


Gaia
[Melissa]

Post by [Melissa] »

Aww sweetie my prayers go out to you.
It is always hard when telling someone you care about your inner most feelings and wishes but I just want to tell you that you don't have to say anything until your totally ready with it. Not everyone is tolerant of other peoples paths and some people are, its what we all have to come across in life.
I think before you tell him you should truly come to terms yourself with what faith you are and even though every ones path grows in time the fundamentals of it usually stay the same.
When you've done that you could compile a folder of some sort of research on it detailing what it is you've chosen so you can show him exactly what your about.
Most in toleration comes from ignorance. If you show him exactly what your about with facts etc. it might help stamp out some myths about witchcraft he has, helping your course.
Catholics believe we are helping the Devil with his work but if you show him your path is different then that should help you.
Lastly really try to enthesis your still the same person and nothings changed, most parents fear change in their children more then anything. Bless them. :D

I really hope that helps... :)
hedge*
Posts: 1195
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 11:26 am
Gender: Female
Location: sitting on top of my mushroom

Post by hedge* »

Melissa wrote: you don't have to say anything until your totally ready with it.
I really hope that helps... :)
Agree with this totally.
Wait until you are ready hun.
I understand that you want the people closest to you to really know you as a person but some things are best left for another time.

Maybe let your father see how much you revere nature. Point out to him a pretty flower or an amazing tree....something along those lines.
ThePaganMafia
Posts: 90
Joined: Sun Nov 18, 2007 12:53 am
Gender: Female
Location: Mobile, Alabama
Contact:

Post by ThePaganMafia »

If all it would do is cause drama then for your best interests then maybe you should not tell that side of the family?
[img]http://i3.tinypic.com/832gfna.jpg[/img]
The Official ThePaganMafia Fan Forum:
http://thepaganmafia.proboards53.com/index.cgi
Gaia

Post by Gaia »

Well, I was thinking of not telling him, but It doesn't feel right with me to leave him in the dark. He just proposed to my mom a few weeks back, so he is now part of my family. But yes, I think I will wait till I'm ready to tell him about me being a Witch. He's a country man so I can assume he's somewhat into nature, maybe that will help. Plus, I'm getting support from the few Witch friends of mine at school (bless them for everything they've done for me!).
Revolpathon
Banned Member
Posts: 399
Joined: Thu Sep 06, 2007 11:05 am
Gender: Female
Location: Netherlands

Post by Revolpathon »

i haven't told my best friend about me being pagan orientated, and about me reading the tarot and doing other things.
and he knows everything about me and i tell him everything except for that part of my live, even though it's a big part of my life.

i did test the waters kinda, unintentionally during halloween, that's when i knew i should just keep my mouth shut about that.


my parent's don't know it and if it's up to me, they'll never find out because it doesn't further my agenda.

if they need to know then tell them, if you want to have someone to talk about it and you want them to be it then tell them. but if you can do your thing behind their backs then by all means do that. i guess your mom and sis's are okay with it so you only have to hide it for your step dad, because if he is against it then there's nothing more you can do.

i'm rambling and getting chaotic so i think i'll stop here.
Gaia

Post by Gaia »

No, no, talking with you is really helping. I thank you.
[EarthWitch]
Posts: 323
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2007 9:08 am

Post by [EarthWitch] »

If your mom is cool with it, maybe she can help set the stage for you when you are ready.
...not all who wander are lost... (tolkein)

I am the daughter of Earth and Water
and the nursling of the sky-
I pass through the pores of the oceans and shores
I change, but I never die.
-shelley-
jcrowfoot
Posts: 1448
Joined: Sat Dec 23, 2006 6:51 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Highland, IN

Post by jcrowfoot »

Ok. First of all... there's Catholic and there's Catholic. :D

My hubby to be seems very conservative until you start talking to him about certain things.... and religion is one of them. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with me regardless if I ever converted. Certainly, he'd be happy if I did, but... he's never going to pressure me, or nag me or look down on me because of how I worship. I wouldn't be marrying the guy if he did.

Always be careful, however. I decided once to tell my very cool seeming dad about my religion, but... it was after he'd been diagnosed with cancer... so he thought that I was gonna burn since he'd just found religion... one of those really fire and brimstone protestant kind. He was easier to deal with when he was Quasi-Catholic. :?
Sobek
Banned Member
Posts: 2131
Joined: Fri Sep 08, 2006 3:36 am

Post by Sobek »

either you tell them or you don't. either it goes bad or it doesn't. I'm not usually so black and white but thats the way it is.

How exactly does one "soften the blow"? I see this all the time, when people attempt to soften the blow it get's whoever they are talking more worried than they would be should they simply be told. Shock, most likely but people deal and if they don't then screw them. when it comes down to it you just have to wiegh up whether it is worth it or not.
Gaia

Post by Gaia »

Yeah, your right. I'll just see where things take me and hopefully, everything will turn out right.


Gaia
Post Reply

Return to “Teen Concerns”