Very Bad Dream With a Friend

[casnarl]

So last night I had a rather upsetting dream with a friend of mine from some of my Geography classes. Let's call him A. The other character was my old boss, who we'll call B.

I was in a car with B and we saw A so I rolled the window down and A said he was going to kill B, unless I sacrificed myself and became his personal sex and torture device. B had been an amazing boss and I highly doubt any other job I get in life will have as understanding of a boss, so I didn't want to see B die, so I said okay.

The details of what A did I don't particularly feel like typing, but it was bad. I'd say the only word I could use to describe A would be monster. And he ended up killing B anyways because he was jealous or something.

The thing now is because of how strongly the dream affected me that I'm still thinking about it 20 hours later as I'm about to go to sleep again. And I'm not very happy about going to those classes this week and seeing him because I think when I see his face I'm going to remember it and whatnot, and it's going to be hard to be around him.

I have a theory about why I had such a dream. We've been friends for about 2 years since we're both Geography majors. He's 25 years my senior and recently we've gotten closer as I've gotten less shy and more talkative and for a day or two I pondered the notion of feelings and if I could ever be interested in someone who was the same age as my dad or if that'd be too weird for me. I ended up deciding it wasn't something I was comfortable with and let it pass and just went on being friendly. And now that I've had this dream I am near certain any inkling of feeling is well and truly dead But my theory is I had this dream to confirm that, that I will not have any feelings towards him.

But how do you just go on being friends with someone who was pure evil, albeit in a dream? Like I can't blame him for stuff he did in a dream but still.

[corvidus]

Wow that’s some heavy shit!

Do you know what a Paradox is? In Hermeticism, the Paradox is a foundational principle of reality. I’m Christian tradition, it’s the all-knowing, all-powerful, all-benevolent God allowing Evil to exist. It’s one of the most difficult lessons to learn, usually for the specific reason you wrote about. Good and Evil, however, are just metaphors.

Right and wrong
Empty and full
High and low
Left and right

It’s the One which defines the other.

My thinking is that it was a multilayered message.

[SnowCat]

That's a disturbing dream. It could be your subconscious telling you that taking the friendship to another level would be a disaster. I can understand the reluctance to be around him again, but let your dream be a guide, not an absolute.

Snow

[casnarl]

SnowCat yeah that's what I was thinking. Like a sign that I should just be friends and nothing more.

Corvidus, I'd be curious to know what other sort of meanings it could have. Maybe it had nothing to do with this friend at all and my mind just used him to convey something else, although if that's the case I entirely missed it and just focused on him.

[corvidus]

Corvidus, I'd be curious to know what other sort of meanings it could have. Maybe it had nothing to do with this friend at all and my mind just used him to convey something else, although if that's the case I entirely missed it and just focused on him.

Haha well it is the more pleasant interpretation

The subconscious mind tends to do things like that, so I wouldn’t be surprised. For example, I’ve had countless similar dreams. There was a period early on in my practice where I couldn’t even get a decent nights sleep because of them.

The way I’ve been able to manage it is, while falling asleep, focus the attention on the Crown chakra. Doing this will tune your subconscious into more spiritual areas.

[Crazy Cat Lady]

What I have done when I had a disturbing dream about someone I know (and are friendly enough to discuss that sort of thing with) is just be upfront about it. "So, I had this really crazy dream last night about you being really violent....I know it has nothing to do with reality but it's got me feeling disturbed and twitchy, so I might seem akward around you for a bit- please don't take it personally. I still like you." Lol, I've had dreams that I was really mad at people and had to work through those unwarranted feelings in real life with them. I think everyone has that happen sometimes.

[casnarl]

What I have done when I had a disturbing dream about someone I know (and are friendly enough to discuss that sort of thing with) is just be upfront about it. "So, I had this really crazy dream last night about you being really violent....I know it has nothing to do with reality but it's got me feeling disturbed and twitchy, so I might seem akward around you for a bit- please don't take it personally. I still like you." Lol, I've had dreams that I was really mad at people and had to work through those unwarranted feelings in real life with them. I think everyone has that happen sometimes.

Yeah, I've had dreams where my (now ex)boyfriend would do things and he used to find it hilarious how mad I'd get at awake-him for things that dream-him did

This I think might be a little bit harder to do though, just because of how bad the dream was.

[Crazy Cat Lady]

I definitely wouldn't share the details of it, just that you are temporarily struggling a bit with associating him with a bad dream and that you might be a bit awkward around him as you readjust to reality.

[casnarl]

I seem to be handling it well. I am still aware of the dream but I'm making the distinction between real him and dream him. So I've been able to be around him okay.