The Diary of Electra Serpentine
-
asthesunlovesthemoon
- Posts: 89
- Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:04 pm
- Gender: Female
The Diary of Electra Serpentine
Welcome to my blog!
-
asthesunlovesthemoon
- Posts: 89
- Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:04 pm
- Gender: Female
The Truth
A few days ago I understood the truth about depression. For a while, I was okay, but then I realized, the pain doesn't go away. You make room for it.
I found myself wanting to die again, and I found myself again not being able to do anything about it. My mother gets so upset when I'm depressed. She gets angry, and there's nothing she does now besides think that if she punishes or yells at me enough, that I will get better. All that happens is I get worse.
We've been through so much therapy, but it's always like she doesn't care if she learned not to punish me for being depressed. She just says I need to toughen up and get over it. On top of that, I can not even practice my own religion.
This isn't a rant about my mother, this is about the truth. The truth is that my depression wasn't all chemical like I thought. My depression could be all situational. Maybe the drugs don't even work, maybe there's no one in the world who can fix me.
There's no one in the world to love me. There's not love between humans. At least not for me, but for me there is only Loki.
I found myself wanting to die again, and I found myself again not being able to do anything about it. My mother gets so upset when I'm depressed. She gets angry, and there's nothing she does now besides think that if she punishes or yells at me enough, that I will get better. All that happens is I get worse.
We've been through so much therapy, but it's always like she doesn't care if she learned not to punish me for being depressed. She just says I need to toughen up and get over it. On top of that, I can not even practice my own religion.
This isn't a rant about my mother, this is about the truth. The truth is that my depression wasn't all chemical like I thought. My depression could be all situational. Maybe the drugs don't even work, maybe there's no one in the world who can fix me.
There's no one in the world to love me. There's not love between humans. At least not for me, but for me there is only Loki.