I guess the best place to begin is what I have been feeling lately. A few days ago my boyfriend's sister and I had a major falling out. That is nothing new because his sister really doesn't like me. I am unsure why. People have been telling me that it may just be because one, she's jealous of me, or two, she doesn't like others being happy. I am almost tempted to believe the second one because whenever she is around the air becomes thicker... and it seems to vibrate with anger... But, this is not what has been bugging me. After three years, I have come accustomed to how the room changes when she is in it. What bugs me is my reaction a few days ago. I just became filled with rage and couldn't stop myself from blurting out my frustrations. I usually have more control than that... But since that night I have kind of felt lost. Some of it has cleared a little since then, but I still can't shake this feeling. Almost as if I am lost and alone, with no idea what direction to go in.... The only thing that keeps remaining constant, though, is the love I feel from my boyfriend and my family back home and here. It gives me hope. I keep feeling as though I need to talk to my mother, though... I have always been really close to her, and it's so strange being so far away from her... Thankfully I am going home to visit in October. It can't come soon enough.