confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, and transgender discussion and questions.
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Alina_Rose
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confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

I have been thinking about becoming a guy.... But then I met my boyfriend and he doesnt want me too... Now im confused about it... I feel more like a guy then a girl... But.... Im just... Confused... Can someone please help me out?
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Victoria Mnemosyne
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Victoria Mnemosyne »

Take it slow. A sex change is expensive and drastic. Try shorter hair, no makeup, boys clothes, etc. If you do that and go. "woah, for the first time I feel like my outside matches my inside" then no boyfriend is worth giving that up. The person you should be with should want you to be happy and comfortable.
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Alina_Rose
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

I have done that... And well... I was like that.... Maybe I should just be happy to be what I am...
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EmpathicalRose

Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by EmpathicalRose »

Alina_Rose wrote:I have been thinking about becoming a guy.... But then I met my boyfriend and he doesnt want me too... Now im confused about it... I feel more like a guy then a girl... But.... Im just... Confused... Can someone please help me out?
I can totally understand where you come from, and let me be the first to say (but defintely not the last) that what we as Transgenders go through, is very complex, and drastic. And, at certian points, (those who purse the surgery to made the mind and bdy unifed as one) is literally expensive, and almost little to no insurance companies will pay for such an expansive procdure.
What you need to do is take it slow. Get your mind and body adjusted for it, because really if you don't its going to be one hell of a battle and that's not at all fun. Start with the baby steps. Change your wardobe to match what you feel. Dress to how you feel. Because, in all honesty, its you who has to have the make the ultimate choice, and when you do, it can't be reversed.

But, I have something that I think you should look into, and its a medical term. And the term is as such: Gender Dysphoria. Google that, and go through that sites you come up with. (excuulding wikipedia, because they don't give answers). Gender Dysphoria is a serious mental conidition, and if you're explaining it, like I think you're explaining it, then you might be among the few of the rare cases where you have this.
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Alina_Rose
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

Thank you :) that was very helpful :D My Psychologist doesnt think I have that though but who knows lol...
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EmpathicalRose

Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by EmpathicalRose »

See, the thing is, that for a sex change to be even apporaved, or to approaved for HRTs, you have to live as your desired role for a YEAR or more. Some might say TWO some might say ONE. Every psychologist is different.

They make you live as your assigned role for that length of time to make sure that this is what you want to go through. And once you get your HRTs you can't miss a dose. It'll mess with your body.

You have to SHOW them that this is what you want, otherwise they won't apporve you. Period.

It's best to document all your signs and symptoms as well as what causes/caused them. Have a good list made out when you go to your GID doctor/phystriacst. Show them, and express to them that this is how you feel.
Tell them that you feel uncomfortable and you can see yourself as the oppisite gender.

If you don't prove to them or show them that this is how you feel, then they can misdaigonse you. Which would be fatal for you in the long run.
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Alina_Rose
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

Thanbk you :) I think I will just dress like a guy :)
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Xiao Rong
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Xiao Rong »

Well - not to tell you about what gender identity to be, but gender isn't just male/female. Many of my friends identify as genderqueer, which is basically an umbrella term for a gender that doesn't fit neatly into male/female, and means whatever you want it to be, and expressed however you want to express it.
~ Xiao Rong ~ 小蓉 ~ Little Lotus ~
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Alina_Rose
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

Thank you Xiao. I think I'll do that :)
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SnowCat
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by SnowCat »

One of my home care consumers is gay. He tried to get a reaction from me by being very blatant about it. My response was "okay, now let's see how your dressings look." I figure, he likes guys, I like guys. He likes cats, I like cats. We have those things in common. He is who he is supposed to be, and that's what matters.

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Alina_Rose
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Re: confused about what gender I want to be... Help?

Post by Alina_Rose »

Haha that's great! I couldn't agree more :)
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