I was in a bad relationship, which affected me deeper than I thought. I was depressed, and felt stuck and that darkness stayed with me even after I left the relationship.
At 23 years of age, I did ponder ending my life - and my own thoughts was that I had experience the highs, the lows and everything in between.
And if that was all there is, then I was ready to check out and stop the torture of cyclical life. I can still remember feeling that I had no more sadness or fear about "leaving" - it was just the numbness and sometimes paralysing force of being expected to just do what comes next. Expectations of Life.
It was a period that I was in for close to a year, before I had a spiritual awakening. In its own way, it did allow me to acknowledge my experiences, and that everything I had gone through gave me a starting point to understand the extremes of Life in general.
Towards the end, a larger plan was shared with me - to make myself complete and whole, not for my own benefit but to be part of humanity's destiny.
It is still the path I walk today, and in full alignment and surrender to Life/God/Universe/Consciousness, many further revelations have been made and continue to be revealed.
Along the way, I've also met a fellow human being, who through his own wounds is also accelerating towards destruction - somehow we managed to heal together, and are now life partners for the past 7 years.
I think out of everything I've learnt or have been shown, I would like to share that there is an intelligent force watching over you. Larger than magick, spells, spirits, or darkness. I won't sugarcoat or offer empty words of encouragement, just that while you are here, alive and able to, make all efforts to connect to that force.
You owe it to yourself to know and understand it and have it communicate to you what is required of you, regardless what choice you ultimately make.
Peace and good thoughts go out to you. ::hug::
Last edited by YanaKhan
on Mon Oct 29, 2018 3:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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