Coming Out--HELP

Lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, and transgender discussion and questions.
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Do I tell my parents or not?

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Coming Out--HELP

Post by InHonorOfHecate »

Ok, so I've been bisexual for a while now but now I think I'm lesbian(thats another story though.) and I wanna tell my parents that I'm bi. But:
My dad is homophobic;
my mom doesn't think it's "right".
Uh....yeah. What am I supposed to do? I told all my friends including a guy friend and I have it on facebook as Interested In: Women but my parents don't know. I consistently watch Logo, the "gay channel" which it is, and they still haven't TAKEN THE HINT!!! How do I tell them? GAHHHH!!! Help me please.

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Post by reikihealer83 »

As someone who struggled with this same issue about 9 years ago let me offer some wisdom. I am a bi male and honestly, I did not see the point in telling my folks that I was Bi. I honestly thought I was flat out gay for a while and when I did mention it to my parents they were sad and coming from a religious home it made for an interesting predicament. I did not get kicked out or anything because my parents ROCK but when I figured out I was only Bi I decided not to tell them because it really was not needed. I think they suspect that I like men as well as women but they have never broached the subject but if I was asked point blank I would gladly tell them I am bi. The real question you should ask yourself is, will it make you happy to tell them no matter what happens or wait until it is absolutely needed? I wish you the best of luck on this difficult journey and I hope I have helped in some small way.

Brightest Blessings :)


Post by InHonorOfHecate »

Thnx. :)

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Post by NightRose »

Honestly, come out when you feel ready and are able to support yourself on your own. If for some reason they take it rather poorly, you don't want to be dependent on them for anything. I am bisexual, and chose to never broach the topic with my parents because 1) I'd like holiday dinners to be peaceful and 2) I'm married to a man. If I was with a woman, I would bring it up and deal with the consequences...but I'm also out of the house, financially stable, and really don't have to see them if they throw a fit.

Also, if you are in the United States, consider finding a local PFLAG chapter (parents, family and friends of lesbians and gays). They offer a lot of support for all LGBT and those who know them, offer support and reading material on coming out, and have meetings that families can attend to learn more and be able to talk with other families in similar situations. Find a local chapter at

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Post by [ShadowPhoenix] »

Each situation of ours is delicate and unique. You must weigh the pros vs. the cons in your particular situation, if the pros outweigh the cons, by all means tell them. As for me, I learned to stop caring what others thought long ago...those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.


Post by InHonorOfHecate »

In a couple more years I'll be going to college so I guess I shouldn't tell them until I graduate.
On a sad note, my girlfriend broke up with me last night because her sis was going to tell everybody. So. I don't know what to do now.

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