Hello all. I’ll start by saying I’m not a fully fledged Wiccan. It’s always something that peaked my interest but I’ve not completely invested my time into it as much as I should. I’ve tried to change that lately but it seems to have had consequences. Now before I start, I don’t claim to have special abilities. I do have some interest in the supernatural, however I wouldn’t say I’m a complete believer.
Quick backstory event: When I was young, possibly between 11-13, is when I first started looking into Wicca. I often had very vivid dreams and was naturally curious. And obviously Wicca was something I was always drawn to. I was a particularly anxiety-ridden teen, so I looked into meditation. I practised meditation for approx. a week. Just lying down, burning some herbs, and trying to clear my mind. One time, I fell into a highly deep sleep. I was walking around a house, in England, and it was like I was in someone else’s body. I remember feeling a sense of anxiousness and fear of being “caught”, but determined. This WASNT me. It was what the person I was inside of was feeling if that makes sense? It was like I was trapped in this woman’s body, living her life and feelings. There was a young girl who I think was my daughter, I remember telling her to her under a mattress and keep quiet. Getting impatient when she kept asking questions. I remember the girls name, it was Shannon.
I woke up and thought it was weird. I had a strange sensation in my gut but I just ignored it. Until I read the News not long after. A girl named Shannon has gone missing. Her Mother (the woman I was trapped in) was on the TV acting as a terrified Mother who wanted her daughter home. But I knew she was lying. I remember I said to my Mum “Shannon is being put under the bed but she’s alive.” After a lengthy media frenzy, it turned out I was RIGHT. My dream was pretty much spot on. The poor girls sicko Mother had faked her daughters kidnapping to get money and attention. It was all over the News, I hope some of you have heard about the case so you know what I’m talking about. After that I, and my Mother was astonished. It always sat in the back of my mind but I decided to ignore it. I didn’t meditate again.
However last night, I was feeling run down, and decided to give it a go. I’ve mixed up some sage and lavender oil and rubbed in on my chest, mostly because I had a cold and I enjoy the aromatherapy. I suffer from insomnia so I decided to clear my mind and get some rest. I remember the smell of the sage was really making me drift off, I could even smell it in my dream state.
Now I’ve sometime been able to be aware I’m dreaming, and “control” the dream somewhat from within. I know there’s a technical term for it but I can’t remember what it’s called. So my dream started off nicely, I new I was dreaming and was walking around what looked like a rural, country area. Middle of no where kind of place but I was enjoying the scenery. Then this weird “snap” happened. I wasn’t in that area anymore more. I was driving a car to a gas station. Which I thought was weird because I can’t drive. I felt an insane amount of rage, and for lack of a better term, murderous intent. However I was also eerily calm. I knew I was about to do a bad thing. I couldn’t control my body, I was like an internal spectator. I saw my hands and clothes and realised I was in the body of a man. I pulled out of the trunk a variety of guns, machetes ect. And I went into the gas station. I proceeded to kill everyone in there. There was one man in particular who I was after, everyone else was just a witness/collateral damage. I don’t want to go into graphic details, but I made him suffer until the end.
I was trapped in this evil man’s body, literally screaming in damn terror, but the screams didn’t come out. I had to watch as this man committed these crimes, trapped in his body as he did it. He/I then emptied some stuff from the register, and casually left. Once he/I stepped outside, I “snapped” back into what I was doing before the snap, enjoying the rural countryside. But I was terrified. Then I woke up. I was in a state of absolute panic, I honestly felt like I had killed these people. To the point where I spent a good 30 minutes feeling like I should turn myself in. Obviously once I calmed down I realised it was just a dream, that didn’t happen in the UK, so it couldn’t of been me. Plus I’m not a man. The the feelings of rage, and being caught by the police, are still lingering even now. Even though I’ve done nothing wrong!!
I decided a few hours ago to look into it online. It was hard as hell to look for attacks of gas stations since they are so frequent, however something popped up about a man of ethnic origin having been hacked to death with a machete, and others shot dead in an attack that happened a while ago somewhere in South Africa. I saw a few pictures and they 100% matched my dream. I saw pictures of a corpse that wore the same clothes, had the same wounds, died in the same position that I saw. As you can imagine, I’m mortified and feel scared and disgusted in myself. It was so vivid I honestly feel responsible, even though I’m absolutely against violence. I’m not a bad person. Please don’t judge me, or feel horrified that I looked up these things. I just needed to know!
I’ve had many vivid dreams before that leave me with that uneasy feeling in my gut, but most of the time I ignore them. After last night I wonder if it was some kind of “seeing the future” kind of deal. However the dream I had happened in the past. I don’t know any other way to describe it other than it felt like I had projected myself into someone else’s body, but had no control and had to live through their actions, even they’re thoughts and feelings.
Is this possible? And if so, what does it mean? If it is some kind of gift, it honestly feels like a curse! However my gut is telling me that it’s something I need to work on and understand instead of avoiding it.
Can someone please tell me what the hell is going on?!!! Do I just have an overactive imagination or is it something more?