How do I approach my mom about spirituality?

[YanaKhan]

Hello, everyone.
So, this is kinda weird for me. Let me start with some history.
My mother and I have a really good relationship. We always did, but to be fair, I have never ever been able to discuss spirituality/belief with her. She has been an atheist her whole life and I was also raised as one. Until very recently.
Due to joint pain in her knee, she visited this Reiki practitioner who was of great help and my mom said she did feel a lot better after, so she decided she'll take a course in Reiki. The practitioner told her she should research more about energy healing and so my mom started learning more and more about it. She started sharing some very interesting links from the internet, things I've read before and started discussing spiritual paths with me. But like "I read this, it sounds kinda ridiculous, but maybe there are people who believe in it". My initial thought was, she actually is starting to believe it, but is afraid I wouldn't, so she's making sure I don't laugh about it (which I wouldn't).

Now, I'm extremely glad she's coming to her spirituality and I would love to share my knowledge with her, but we've never had this kind of relationship where we could freely talk about Gods, spiritual paths etc... She firmly believes I'm an atheist to the core and as strange as it sounds, I too am a little afraid she would dismiss my beliefs and practices. We live about 400 miles away from each other and she's not really aware of anything I've been practicing or learning.

So my question is, how do you approach someone who is 65 and is just coming to her spirituality? I know I can be of help to her and do want to be, just don't really know how to start such a conversation. I know it seems stupid, I'm not a child and my parents are not devoted Christians/Muslims etc, who would think I'm worshiping the Devil or anything. Still, it's a dodgy subject for me.

Thanks for any tips, ideas, thoughts.

[lunamoth]

Hey. My mother's in her 80s and IS Catholic... I was raised that way too, but she knows that I follow a different path and have for many years. We have had discussions, because when I am going through some hard times she doesn't understand why I dont' pray...Jesus will help you, etc. And I tell her I do pray, I just dont talk to the same Gods that she does. Try telling her that Nature is your church. My mother sees life in all living things, and loves animals and believes in the power of your thoughts. However she is old now and although I feel I could enlighten her to ease some of the suffering she has always gone through mentally, she is pretty set in her ways. It feels weird at first to have a spiritual discussion with someone you're not used to doing that with, but it may grow as time goes on. Start with just a little thing here and there. See what happens . Good Luck!

[Xiao Rong]

I understand a lot of that reluctance, Yana. My mother is similar -- she's been pretty agnostic/atheist her whole life (raised me that way too) but is just now starting to talk about spirituality. I think if she is open to Reiki and energy work, then she's more open than she think it is. She's a really firm believer in positive thinking and affirmations, and the more we talked about it, the more I felt like I could describe some beliefs in my path, such as energy, embracing the Shadow, celebrating the natural cycle, the Web of Life, etc. Until one day (I can't even remember the subject) I slipped and said "we believe" instead of "I believe", and she said, "Wait, who's we?" And I explained to her that I was Pagan, and by that point she was very open to it.

I won't lie, I started down this path with a lot of the same, "Wow, this sounds ridiculous ... but some people believe in it": that was more directed towards myself than anyone else, my own innate reluctance to embrace the "woo" that I actually really wanted to explore more. You might not be able to discuss everything at first, but it might help to ease her into the conversation. Eventually you might find that you have so many beliefs and practices in common that explaining you're a witch or Pagan won't be too much of a leap at all.

[Seraphin]

If I were you, I would tell to my Mom to begin learning the power of affirmations and prayers to the Highest Ideal and appreciating the amazing impacts these simple spiritual actions were having on her life. Tell her that it would be crazy and intense experience and she would be wanting more.

Through this, she might be squeezing in learning spirituality every spare moment of the day. Encourage her to read reams of articles on some trusted website or books.

Just be with her in this journey and help her walk the baby steps that would probably spread out over weeks, months, and years. Continue to share your experiences and knowledge. Tell her your history. Explain to her this journey would not be black and white as your story makes it sound, but tell her that the most important thing in a spiritual journey isn't strength or intelligence, but persistence.

[YanaKhan]

Thank you, guys! It's really important to me!
I mean, I am not really afraid she's gonna find out about my being a pagan, she'll accept it sooner or later. But I can see she's willing to go that way too and am struggling to start talking to her about it. So thank you for the great advice.
I'll start with the small things, not religion, but maybe some divination (she's already familiar with coffee divination, so it won't be that hard), pendulum, even Tarot. I may tell her I got a Tarot deck and offer her readings - she's a person who would like to know how things work.

Then maybe I'll introduce her to the Wheel of the year. I can also draft some simple daily rituals she can do home to improve her health or maybe cleanse the house from negative energy.

Again, thanks so much, you've all been of great help!

[Cernunnos]

I told my parents about it suddenly, my mom was just discussing religion (She's open to all really, we've never been a religiously "static" family) and she asked me if I believe in anything and I straight up told her I'm a Wiccan, after which she's even gone as far as to buy me supplies.

[Lainara]

I specifically remember a time in my life when I discussed my spirituality with my father.
I was 12, and we were waiting for Chinese takeout. I don't know how we got on the subject, but I told my father I wasn't really sure whether there was a god or not.
My dad grew up catholic, and while he never went to church or anything, he still was sure Catholicism was "the right way"
I remember my dad's face turn a beet red as he yelled at me, "How can you not believe in god?!" Nothing he was yelling was very helpful or swaying, so it put me off to the idea of any religion for a long time, and I had never talked about my beliefs with him since. Now at 22, finding wicca about 3 years ago, I decided to share it with him about a month ago that I was a practicing witch.
I was getting a tattoo on my arm, and he was asking me the reason behind it. Not a lot of my tattoos have meaning but this one was about my spirituality. Specifically about it saving my life.
Whether it was because I was telling him how important it was to me, that maybe all along he didn't care WHAT I believed, as long as I had some sort of spirituality, or it was just enough time had passed that maybe he stopped caring about instilling his beliefs on me...I'm not sure.
But I went in with an open mind, and decided that whether he hated what I believe or not, it does not matter. That whether this was a deal breaker for me as his daughter was no concern of mine.
He smiled at me, and said "That's really awesome, Bec." He told my mother about it, and now she hounds me for tarot readings whenever she comes over hehe

What I'm saying is, go into it with an open mind. I think you'll find peace, no matter what she says.

[YanaKhan]

Thank you all so much! I really appreciate the advice.
saricchiella, when you have the time, please go to the top section of the forum and introduce yourself. We would love to get to know you better. Thanks.

[mrsdavid1975]

My great grandmother had a LOT of gifts. My grandmother and mother do too but they fight them. They saw how everyone thought my great grandmother was crazy because she knew things before they happened. When you tell people random things like the exact price of bread in the future, or that we're going to have a black president one day ....they just think you're crazy. So my mom and grandmom are always battling themselves. The funny thing is my mom will call me ( drunk lol because she can't handle herself) and tell me she dreamt of so and so and she will laugh about and say. " isn't that crazy?!" And she knows I am accepting of who we all are and the gifts given to us. I always tell her. .. "You know. Sometimes crazy is being normal. '. She also calls me and tells me to read cards for her or " can you please curse Charles. ?! I'm so sick of his shit. " lol. ( he's my grandmoms husband. Nobody likes him he's an ass). And I laugh. But that's the only way she knows how to connect. She laughs it off so people won't judge her. You know your mom better than anyone. .. And she knows more than you give her credit for. I think it's funny when one generation tried to hide things from another. Like we don't have the same DNA and issues. Like we don't know who they are even though our blueprints came from theirs.

[YanaKhan]

So, this is a very old thread, but I thought I'd add some updates to it.

There isn't much to say really, but I actually told my mom I'm a pagan and an eclectic one. I also told her I practice rituals to improve my health, to cleanse the house and things like that and she surprised me by being extremely receptive of it all and even asking me for a house cleansing ritual.

Her latest obsession are my Witches runes - I did a reading for her and she was absolutely fascinated. Now she wants me to make her a set and translate the interpretations so she can do readings for her friends.

I'm actually very happy and feel quite relieved she is so interested and not sceptical in any way. It's so nice to have someone to share your practices with. Well, not all of them, but one step at the time

[SpiritTalker]

I think your mom might be just as excited about sharing with you as you are with her.

[Bychan Wulf]

That's so nice! Sharing is extraordinary,especially when you do it with someone that close! I'm happy for you!

[Firebird]

Oh Yana how comfortable! Maybe you two could have a small Yule ritual?
One of my favorite and simplest is to sit in the darkness for a bit ...speak some words and acknowledge that, then light a candle signaling the baby light being born... speak some words, then light the fireplace to mimic the growing light and say a prayer of some sort for the new year, viola!
Maybe sit around and have some wasail and do a tarot or rune reading!
Anyway thanks for the update, always nice to hear good news

Bb, Firebird

[Ethereal Moon Rose]

That is wonderful news, Yana! Happy for you!

[moonraingirl]

What a great news, I'm happy for you and your mum. This will strengthen your relationship