19 and done nothing with my life :/

[Sastual Auxels]

Hey all, I'm almost 19 and I'm stuck in this room and achieved nothing in life, everything I plan falls apart and I have just beaten depression after 3 years and am stuck on what to do next, I need some divine help, I need the gods to come down and make me successful, give me a job that I can do right or let me make money from my art and get me sorted, I've fought for 3yrs and I'm exhausted only to find I need to fight harder in order to actually do something in life because it's not enough for me to still BE here or still BE alive but I have to earn and fight for my right to live and I just need some divine help:
Ok I never explain myself properly but here is what I'm actually asking:
A success spell
A job spell
A happiness spell
and just some help in general on what I am meant to do and what I am meant do with myself and how to live like a proper person and not constantly hate being alive because of how hard it is to actually BE alive... I just need help and have noone else to talk to about anything like this sorry for posting a topic about myself I just can't see what I'm meant to do

[luckimmortal]

wait.

[Sastual Auxels]

Wait? for what? I've been waiting for over 3 months now, all I do is eat, sleep and drink and draw and get reminded of how I've done nothing with this life and how much it costs for me to live so I'm a little sick of waiting

[Zili]

For spells you can go to the top of the page now and below the banner is some links to Starwitch's main site and there's several spells.

[Coralie]

I noticed in your original post you largely focused on the negetives rather than the positives which is only natural if you're depressed. However it might help to try and think of the positive things you have in your life as well as the negetive. Spells are all well and good but are far more effective with a little natural positive re-enforcement.

Also I tend to find that spells work much better if done in a positive frame of mind.

Maybe write down a list of good things you have. For example do you have any friends or family that are supportive or even just make you smile? You also mentioned needing a job and becoming sucessful so maybe list any quailifications, or skills or contacts that will help you get one. Half of getting a job is positivity and being able to sell yourself.

Also maybe get into the habbit of showing your art to other people because having your work appreciated by others will reassure of your self-worth. Maybe also see if you can get onto an art course that will give you a quailification that will allow you to get an art based job. Also you're likely to meet like minded people who can provide you with friendship. This is slightly dependent on where you live but one of my friends managed to get into uni off the back of her art portfolio as her quailifications weren't very good.

Also maybe start your own little project to keep you busy and help you feel productive. You could even tie it in with creating your own spells. There are referance charts for colours and such on this site and I noticed from reading your profile that you like to write poetry so writing the actual words for the spell should be easy enough. If you need some inspiration you could read through the spells posted here to give you ideas.

Just a couple of ideas I thought I'd throw out there. Sorry if its not entirely on topic.

[Kei Kawazu]

im 20 and i dont even have art never dated dont have friends offline etc

and ive heard, its not how hard you try that matters. Try something new maybe and take it easy.

[Luna Lisa]

I can realate to how you feel. I'm an artist too. It takes a lot to get your name out their to the [ublic to get them to buy your art. It took me at least three years. Just to get my name out to the public. I'm even working on my website for my art. It's not finished yet. I too have suffered from depression it's not easy to deal with. I can understand that. It's like Zili said go to Starwitch's main site. There are several spells there money spells, and prosperity spells.

Blessed Be.

[Melindrose]

You are still young there is no where to go but up, there are people on this board who are over 30. 19 is but the beginning of a life journey. Focus not on what has not happened, but what could be.

[TornUpReaper]

I completely agree with Coralie. You need to look at the good things in life, because there is always something to be happy about, no matter how bad things get. But also, I feel that you need to realize that the gods aren't just going to give you success or give you a job just because you ask for one from them. I understand it is nearly impossible to get a job in the economy today, but you just have to keep trying and applying because someone somewhere will hire you. Just try your hardest, and keep at it. It may seem to be a worthless fight, but I promise it will pay off someday.

[Sastual Auxels]

Thank you what you have said has meant alot, I'm just afraid of stuffing up what I can do while I can do them I mean we only really live to half our life span, the other half our bodies are slowly dying and we can do less and less, I'm 19 so my body is pretty close to the fullest potential and I'm sitting around doing nothing with my life, drawing and hating myself, I just wish life was easier, they don't tell you it's like this when your 5yrs old, they tell you life is great but life is only great when your 5 and too young for life to bring you down, you don't have to worry about everything when your that old.

I have pretty much slowly lost my mates after finishing school, my only true mate now is alcohol haha it's a good friend and makes you forget everything and relax but it always gives you an uppercut while your asleep so you wake up sorer than you were before.

My main problem is just trying to stay positive, I have no idea what my purpose in life is and what I'm even meant to do next, I have 360 degrees of where to put my foot and over half of that is a bear-trap ready it bite my leg off when I step in the wrong place.

I have started though, I've started getting my name out there more and looking for a new job etc but art is the only thing I can do successfully

[Coralie]

I doubt that that many people have achieved a great deal at the age of 19. In fact doing a quick wiki search comes up with a large amount of people who became successful in thier 90's and older! One example is Mae Laborde who became an actress at the age of 93 and is still going strong today at the age of 101. So I wouldn't worry too much about having not done an extraordinary amount with your life.

I would suggest getting yourself out there and talking to people, maybe by taking part in art clubs or sports. As for a job I'm of the opinion that a job is a job and you shouldn't worry too much if you aren't very good at it especially at a young age as it pays the bills which is one less thing to worry about.

[TornUpReaper]

I doubt that that many people have achieved a great deal at the age of 19. In fact doing a quick wiki search comes up with a large amount of people who became successful in thier 90's and older! One example is Mae Laborde who became an actress at the age of 93 and is still going strong today at the age of 101. So I wouldn't worry too much about having not done an extraordinary amount with your life.

I would suggest getting yourself out there and talking to people, maybe by taking part in art clubs or sports. As for a job I'm of the opinion that a job is a job and you shouldn't worry too much if you aren't very good at it especially at a young age as it pays the bills which is one less thing to worry about.

Again I agree. Most 19 year olds really aren't doing much with their lives apart from working at restaurants to save up money for their future. I'm only 21, and that's all that I'm really doing, but I'm not depressed over it. Just try to get a job for now, I'm sure that something will turn up. You just have to charm everyone to death in your interview! And hey, if art is the only thing that you can do well, as you say, once you have a little bit of money maybe you can go to school for art, that way you can pursue careers in art. There are a lot of things to consider. You can be a designer for a magazine, or a traveling artist who does sketches of people at fairs if you want to travel a lot. Why don't you head to a college or school nearby and just pick up a pamphlet about the kinds of classes that they offer and then look at all the options for art. If I remember correctly there were a lot in my college book, and the schools can help you to figure out what direction you want to go in and what you may want to pursue in life. You just have to get there, even if it means you have to flip burgers for a little while just to pay for the local community college. Stay focused, and maybe stay away from the alcohol, because that wont help you progress towards your future. It is just a way to get a quick thrill.

[_Kaimira_]

hi there,

I know how you feel, specially when your depressed. i just turned 19 myself i have a growing resopseablity. I am babysitting an autistic 16 year old who is mentally 12 and it's really hard to handle him i have to take way things he likes and he punched me in the face stating that i was a evil person. the mother is in the hospital for depression. now i see why. my bf dorian is worried about me being 5 months pregnant. he's scared that he is going to get more agressive and hurt me really bad. i have to watch my back now because he gets his rages heads for me.

you do have a live you should take a step and live it. go to the movies have some fun.

[Sastual Auxels]

Thanks Kaimira, but even you, you have a family getting started etc, I've been in a box of severe depression for 3 years trying to get out and now that I'm out I find it even harder than it was.
Its harder in Australia, I live in a very small town with not very man jobs and am constantly told I need to do something with myself and not only that I have a strong urge inside me that I am meant for something great, I was born on Alexander the Greats birthday, I'm not his incarnate or anything but I'm meant for greatness I can feel it and always have, I have a lot of... something... (energy, power? I dont know) I just know I'm meant for something great and have it in me for greatness... how can I achieve that if I haven't even started or KNOW what I am meant to do?? there isn't enough time for me to be sitting around not working towards whatever this thing is! I need to hurry, I'm almost 20. Time goes so fast and I'm in the same place as a year ago only less depression. I've planned for University, Tafe and other things but they always fail on me or fall apart, if there is something that could go wrong it does in the worst way, I swear even the Gods are out against me, its just not probable that all of this keeps going wrong without any divine help for it to go wrong :/

Congrats on the baby by the way and I would listen to your bf, you'd be devastated if something happened.

[Melindrose]

Sast if you want to do something that will make you feel like you are accomplishing things; provided you are not entirely against it, and have no criminal history; may I suggest the NAVY or other military.