Everything Under the Moon

Hi everyone, I'm new so I'm not entirely sure I'm posting in the right place; please feel free to move this if there is somewhere more appropriate.

I wanted to ask for some advice. I had a very abusive childhood which then led to me make a lot of choices in my adult life that weren't good for me. I've been working on myself for a long time now and I've worked through a lot over the years. I find I am still struggling with things like repetitive, negative thoughts, holding on to a lot of anger about the things other people have done to me over time (sometimes many years ago) and assuming the worst in situations. Even something simple, such as asking for a refund if I buy something that doesn't work, makes me feel very anxious as I imagine the assistant will say no and see either a confrontation happening or me having to take the broken product home again (which has never happened; shop staff are always very helpful but it's just an example of the kind of thing I imagine disaster scenarios about, almost without realising I'm doing it sometimes).

What I wanted to ask is, when you are working on those sort of aspects of yourself, is that what you would consider shadow work? I saw a good thread about it with some suggestions to try but I wanted to check that I'm on the right path with it and not misunderstanding what different things mean.

Thanks for any replies

Indeed it is shadow work. And it can be life long.
Unfortunately when one has been raised in or in anyway lived in an abusive relationship, the abused person becomes rather hyper-vigilant towards wrongs done to them, real or perceived. The brain is anticipating trouble, trauma or drama and it's really difficult to turn that off. Sometimes it just can't and that's where ptsd steps in. So imagining disaster scenarios is pretty normal.
Therapy can be helpful in this shadow work as they can reveal tools for transformation. Group setting can reveal other practices that are helpful as well as being great support and also helping one feel they aren't alone in the situation.

Best wishes,
Firebird

I think we willingly drag negative patterns that induce emotional pain until we find a key to heal it.
Yes it may take long, if we will, thoroughly will to find a key, we will.
We stay with bad emotion and find right angel, smudge, prayer, spices etc to disperse the energetic information of such negative pattern.
The time until we find the right key means the pain endures, that is why it is a challenge. Since finding these keys cleanses the world considerably.

firebirdflys wrote: ↑Wed Nov 25, 2020 11:15 am Indeed it is shadow work. And it can be life long.
Unfortunately when one has been raised in or in anyway lived in an abusive relationship, the abused person becomes rather hyper-vigilant towards wrongs done to them, real or perceived. The brain is anticipating trouble, trauma or drama and it's really difficult to turn that off. Sometimes it just can't and that's where ptsd steps in. So imagining disaster scenarios is pretty normal.
Therapy can be helpful in this shadow work as they can reveal tools for transformation. Group setting can reveal other practices that are helpful as well as being great support and also helping one feel they aren't alone in the situation.

Best wishes,
Firebird

Thanks, Firebird. I think this is where I'm at just now - I have really strong physical responses to things that probably wouldn't affect most people (or might just be a bit annoying rather than make them fearful). It tends to happen before my brain even has a chance to think about it and then takes a long time to work through. But I think I'm understanding it better now and maybe that's a step towards healing and bringing things out into the open.

SapphireRoad wrote: ↑Wed Nov 25, 2020 4:16 pm I think we willingly drag negative patterns that induce emotional pain until we find a key to heal it.
Yes it may take long, if we will, thoroughly will to find a key, we will.
We stay with bad emotion and find right angel, smudge, prayer, spices etc to disperse the energetic information of such negative pattern.
The time until we find the right key means the pain endures, that is why it is a challenge. Since finding these keys cleanses the world considerably.

It is the work of finding the key, isn't it? I've tried a lot of things; some things have resolved themselves now but others still seem to be stuck. But I think keep trying is the way to healing it eventually. Thank you for your thoughts Sapphire