Azriel's Dream Journal

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azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

I am going to begin writing these down so that I can view overall patterns and help me remember them so that I can have an easier time down the line.

Alright, so last night had a lot going on but I only remember one aspect. I was walking around, drinking something, and one of my teeth started to sting. It was moving in my mouth and eventually fell out. There was no pain in the removal, and the tooth that fell out was HUGE!

This tooth just fell in my hand and I felt lighter if that makes any sense. :|

I did a little research and I believe that this is representative of me letting go of something unhealthy that I was holding on to. I can live with that. :D

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
User avatar
azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Re: Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

Continuing with the theme of extraction, last night I had a dream where I pulled out a worm from my chin, and then it turned into an orange/brownish metal. :shock:

This time there was a little bit of pain. And I also felt as if the worm, which was small when I pulled it out, was extremely long and coursed throughout my body.

This is the main reason I began this journal, because for the past few days I have been having similar themed dreams. I wish to discover the pattern and what it means.

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
User avatar
azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Re: Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

Last night I had a long dream but there were two separate storylines that occurred.

The first one, I returned to México to be confronted by certain members of my family who were angry and frustrated to see me. They were robotic in their movements and told me that I did not belong there or with their family. My cousin-in-law would not even look at me. They said that I need to leave and never return. So I ran, and since I could not find an airplane, I ran as far as I could.

Here is where the second and more confusing one begins. I continued to run until I come across a Walmart/Target and enter the store. I go to the supplies section and look for a planner. I find a nice leather bound one that appeared to be worn and authentic. I opened it and found that it had already been filled. The front page, and the only one I saw, had a small written passage.
"Hello, my name is Joaquin and I am 13 years old. I am in danger because I am part of the ~~~~A--k--o--m~~ tribe."
The planner also had the sigil of México on it, and I could not quite make out the name of the tribe that he had written. The letters above were what I remember but I do not recall if they were in that order.

Every since I began the process of distilling my shadow, I have been having somewhat uncomfortable dreams but I know that I need to face them and understand what it says about myself. The first dream was definitely part of this theme, but the second one was strange. I will see if anything else occurs to me that might help explain who this boy is and whether there is something I need to do.

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
User avatar
azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Re: Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

Last night I had a another dream that follows with the being pursued theme.

I was in a mall/new age/white/pristine-type building, and I was wandering around. Something arrived to the building, and I knew that it was not a gift. Something was inside and it was after me, so I ran away. I began hiding underneath furniture to run away from whatever this "thing" was. I only had one glimpse of it and it was a black mass with a slight humanoid form. It looked like it had a mix animal and insect limbs.

I knew it was after me, but I did not feel like my life was in danger. I did not feel that this "being" was out to hurt or kill me. I was afraid though. I did not want to face this thing.

The end of the dream had me underneath a bed and the "being" was walking around, I could see it's feet. Then it lowered itself to crawl under to where I was.

I think I am starting to not only see a pattern, but the overall flow of these recent dreams leads me to believe that they are connected and related to the distilling process I am going through right now. First there was the extraction, I was trying to bring things out of myself. I do not know if this was to expel it or to face it. Maybe the latter. Then I was confronted with something that had recently caused me grief and pain, but I ran away. Then in this most recent dream I was being pursued again, but by something that I "knew" or am familiar with. It is hard to explain. All I know is that I need to confront whatever it is that I am running from. My shadow and all things I put aside are trying to get my attention and make me face aspects of myself that I am ashamed of.

Currently, I am in week 3 of my distillation process and I believe that at least 4 weeks are necessary before I can confront my shadow. But, seeing the way my dreams have been progressing, I do not think I will have to wait too much longer.

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
User avatar
azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Re: Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

I realize that I have not posted in a while, but I believe that will come to an end since I have finally completed the process I have been working toward for 6 weeks. Starting in October, I began to distill my Shadow by writing down things that I was Angry, Feared, Jealous and Ashamed of. I had several dreams that brought out emotions that I had been keeping hidden for many years. After these dreams ended, I asked my guides to let me know when I am ready to officially confront the Shadow. Last night I had a dream that let me know that I was ready.

There were many different parts to my dream last night, but they all consisted of me being pursued by something while I had a companion help me on my way. She was beautiful, intelligent, self-confident and everything I wanted to be as a person. After being chased away from school, by my inspiration and by dinosaurs, I finally made it to my grandparent's house.

A new predator began to stalk me at the house and I was afraid. It was a bronze Fu dog and it followed mw from outside the house. Eventually, my companion disappeared and the Fu dog gained entrance as I ran upstairs. I thought I was save, but the Fu dog had followed me and threw me onto the bed. When it placed it's paw on me, it changed form. It took the form of my companion's face with an animals body. I was being overwhelmed by everything that I wanted to change myself into. I was losing myself. Then, on the back of my companion's head I saw a black form protruding. It was my face, and I knew. "You're my shadow, aren't you?" The creature backed off and turned into a brown wolf and faced away from me. Her tail was tucked underneath her legs; as if she was ashamed to have her true form seen by me.

When I woke up, I knew that this was the sign I had been waiting for. I knew it was finally time for me to confront my Shadow.

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
User avatar
azriel
Posts: 189
Joined: Fri Nov 29, 2013 2:47 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Columbia, MD

Re: Azriel's Dream Journal

Post by azriel »

I have not posted a dream in a long time, and in part, it is because I have not been able to recall my dreams in detail. All I can remember is that most of my dreams lately have been nightmares about my new job. It is not that I am being pursued by scary things, or that I am frightened.

I have been having nightmares that I am not doing my job well. I forget that I have customers, or I do not put in their order properly. Little things, but it is what I fear most. I am going to try and meditate to let some of this fear out.

Azriel
^-^~
Unfold your wings and take off into the sky
Before you're burned, become the sun
Blow, oh wind... It guides you into the sky
Before your whole self is taken away

Oasis~~~Gackt
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