6 years ago my grandmother passed away, She died after a long battle with cancer, and I say thank god at times. Not because I did not love her but because I did. & months after her death I was Diagnosed with the same cancer that she had died of at 25 years old. I wasa glad she had moved on because during that time I would never have wanted the woman who basically raised me to watch, as her strong grandson who had graduated from college with a degree in fire sceince, Been a firefighter/Emt, a soldier who served honorably, brought the two and only great grand children she would ever see, and who followed her beleif and the beleif of her grandmother of her grandmother, Waist away to 98 pounds loose all the hair that he had been growing since he was 5, only receiving one hair cut. for. Basic traing.(you know never join the army right when in the army now was looking for gags you and your footlong braid become a joke.) and have the knowlodge that boy may die less than a year after you. (they had given up hope when I went into remission.)
Shortly after her death my mother, who in a reverse of the normal, where the christian becomes pagen, to dispite their parents, began having dreams that my grandmother would appear to her, at first people in her church told her it is normal, you have lost your mother. Now we baried my grandmother, and the bills were piling up put my mother in debt, and made things hard on my father, grandfather, and mother. The dreams continued, and in everyone my grandmother would look at her sadly and point at the picture of herself on the wall. But her christian freinds told her ignore them it ment nothing. for 4 years it would continue, both the dreams and the money problems the death caused and then a devistation hit even harder.
My grandfather died, and it was hard for us all. It was I who found him, me and my brother both being EMTs began CPR, and fought for all our own lives untill the head parametic, arrived and called the death on scene. now the Bills from his barial loomed as well, Neither had had life insurance. Now the dreams my mother had never mentioned to me, as she told me later knowing I was pagen as her mother was she was afraid, I would tell her it was a message from beyond and being a good christian it would have scared the hell out of her.
She finally told me about the dreams the night after my grandfathers death when, (MY grandfather holding true to his personality. when ever he wanted your attention he would playfully scare you, so you would be a little mad enough to listen,) Appeared in her dream along side my grandmother his wife, and screamed a silent scream in my mothers face, while pointing at the picture. But before telling me she confided in a christian friend a southern Babtist none the less.(get alot of them in southern Eastern Shore maryland and virginia.) about it and was told it was not her parents. It was a message from the devil, and that it would escalate if she did not talk to the pastor.
Now my mother grewup with pagens, was raised pagen in secret.(,y grandmother hid the old religion of our family from the outside world as her mother and grandmother had done, as is and was the tradition of almost all pagen religions after the burning time.) So even though she was christian she had a different feeling twards life in general, and finally decided to talk to the only person who had learned from her mother about spirituality, ME. She finally told me about the dreams and asked me what I thought. The picture in question was never moved even to this day it hangs on the wall where it has since the day it was hung in 1923 when my grandfather built the house, for my grandmothers mother, who had hung it there so she would always be able to say goodnight to her daughterthen later kept so that my mother could say goodbye to her mother.
Now you have to understand in the years after my grandmothers death, because of the medical bills for my grandfather who was also not well, money was in short supply, and it got so bad my mother and father were afraid they would have to sell the families old house and move into a cheaper house that they had bought at their wedding for good, because even if they sold the newer house they could not afford the taxes on the old one. and my grandfathers death would have made it all the worse.
When my mother told me of the dreams, finally I told her that in the old religion we are taught not to fear dreams as a dream cannot harm you, and she was right I did tell I beleived it a message, my advise was to ask politly for some knowledge of what gram and pop wanted to says. She took it one further that night in the dream. She in the dream asked two questions, first mother have I ever made you angry or unproud of me and second I do not understand what you wish to say.
In the dream when my mother woke up she called me and told me what the dream had said. in the dream my grandmother had looked at her the way that she had when she was only a child as though she could do no wrong, and again simply pointed at that painting. All the dreams had been about the painting so I told my mother to look at it. I misunderstood, I thought maybe she ment my mother to talk to the painting as my great grandmother had done, she had always said she could here the shadows whisper good night, when she had.
one more year past and now my mother was being forced to sell the big house the day before the realistate agent was to arrive to sign the papers my mother had yet another dream, now my grandmother was persistant, she pushed at the picture, threw things at it, and pointed harder than ever at it, thsi scared my mother so she started to look closly at the picture, and tried to move it to look at the whole frame and something fell on the floor, my mother looked at it and it was a receit, as she turned to lower the larg picture she noticed it could not be moved from the wall as it was attached on just one side, she swung it open and like a dream from some old movie was a small metal box in the wall. Writen over it on the wall, was my grandfathers hand writing, which said I hear the coach but I though you would want these, and three numbers to the lock.
(My grandfather was Irish and after the death of my grandmother never said much, accept I love you, good night, good morning, and then he would watch the road for hours. When you would ask him what he was doing he would say waiting on the black coach.)
When my mother opened the door the only thing in side was a small book with an envelope in it, marking the last page. The envelope contained the life insurance of both my grandmother and grandfather, and a note from him, saying that he had never told her about this because he knew if he had the money would have been gone before it was needed. But the book was my grandmothers book of shadows, mother first did not want to read it but I told her if she had not been ment to she would have not been shown where it was, and I said if nothiong else read simply the last entry in it, and she agreed and it said this.
If you are reading this, I am gone, even now I can feel the cancer as it calls me to the river. I know you have accepted the faith of christian, and that is ok. Shawn knows how I am to be barried as that is the tradition of our beleif, so I know what i would wish would be carried out. But I want you to know something that in our war as mother and daughter mine to hold a child, and yours to become a strong adult, I may not have said. You have never disappointed me, nor have I ever felt ashamed to call you my daughter. (Though yu could have picked a religion that didn't hang yome of your relatives.)
Now the purpose of this, and this is a true story. Why in the hell would someone condem a peacful dream as being evil, before they think it has hurt no one, and evil will hurt first and play nice later. Because of the find the family house did not get sold while the newer one did, when I moved back to germany. The debt was all paid off debt of almost 6 years.
and the answer to my moms second question was answered as well.
Somthings that make a pagan really angry.
-
Ariawyn
very interesting story!
what got me on the edge was before the story was half way through i already knew something was more than significant about the picture. and i knew it had money and something more important. i was practically yelling "Move the picture! Move the Picture!"
im very glad everything worked out. i come from a Catholic background, and know anything that includes spirits and the such is usually a bad warning to them. but once i think about it, i do not think such a simple dream would be so harmful. maybe being too cautious is a bad thing.
its great to hear about your happy ending. i would hate for everything to keep going down hill.
~Skye
what got me on the edge was before the story was half way through i already knew something was more than significant about the picture. and i knew it had money and something more important. i was practically yelling "Move the picture! Move the Picture!"
im very glad everything worked out. i come from a Catholic background, and know anything that includes spirits and the such is usually a bad warning to them. but once i think about it, i do not think such a simple dream would be so harmful. maybe being too cautious is a bad thing.
its great to hear about your happy ending. i would hate for everything to keep going down hill.
~Skye
-
Miss_Molly
awww. its true people are afraid of what they dont understand and its a pity because we can all learn something. ive learnt that if i have the same dream more than four times then it means something. no matter how small.
I live in a christian household, i was a christian but i lost my faith a long time ago. I get my mother telling me that i need to pray before bed and she says 'god bless' when she goes to bed, ive just got used to that cause its her way.
one thing that did annoy me is when my sister got comfermed that the vicar (who we all kniw and love in this area) said to my mum as i was standing next to her 'Is she still lost?' They looked at me and my mum hugged me and said 'She'll find her way back to th light soon.' i could of whacked her and when i was in a mood for the rest of the day i was accused of being a moody and selfish. o well. we cant have everything.
I live in a christian household, i was a christian but i lost my faith a long time ago. I get my mother telling me that i need to pray before bed and she says 'god bless' when she goes to bed, ive just got used to that cause its her way.
one thing that did annoy me is when my sister got comfermed that the vicar (who we all kniw and love in this area) said to my mum as i was standing next to her 'Is she still lost?' They looked at me and my mum hugged me and said 'She'll find her way back to th light soon.' i could of whacked her and when i was in a mood for the rest of the day i was accused of being a moody and selfish. o well. we cant have everything.
-
Miss_Molly
im not but i guess i would prefer them doing that behind my back (id never thought i would say that!) my mum tried to talk me out of being pagan once i had to tell them cause i point black refused to go to church and i said that it was my chioce and it was right for me. my mum lives in her own world and has this 'F*ck you, i want to' attitude at the moment. its sad.
Im not questioning her caring but i'd rather she didn't start this again cause its a touchy subject in our family.
Im not questioning her caring but i'd rather she didn't start this again cause its a touchy subject in our family.
Ah Okay. I understand now.
It's like the mormons who are always pushing their 'Jesus loves you!' propoganda. It makes me want to shove it up.... their car's tailpipe sometimes even though they have the best of intentions. Except that it's your mom so it actually has a bearing on your day to day life.
I guess all you can do is respect her and show that you're a good person despite having different beliefs. When I was younger my mom thought that I was going to turn into a Satan worshipping blah blah blah because I listened to Marilyn Manson all the time. She actually took my CD 3 times (I kept re-acquiring it) in an effort to save me. 10 years later I'm still listening to Manson (sometimes) and I'm still not Christian and I'm still not worshipping Satan... matter of fact I don't believe Satan exists. It'll work out eventually, just perhaps not until you live on your own.
It's like the mormons who are always pushing their 'Jesus loves you!' propoganda. It makes me want to shove it up.... their car's tailpipe sometimes even though they have the best of intentions. Except that it's your mom so it actually has a bearing on your day to day life.
I guess all you can do is respect her and show that you're a good person despite having different beliefs. When I was younger my mom thought that I was going to turn into a Satan worshipping blah blah blah because I listened to Marilyn Manson all the time. She actually took my CD 3 times (I kept re-acquiring it) in an effort to save me. 10 years later I'm still listening to Manson (sometimes) and I'm still not Christian and I'm still not worshipping Satan... matter of fact I don't believe Satan exists. It'll work out eventually, just perhaps not until you live on your own.
-
Miss_Molly