Soulmates aren't always your "perfect mate"

[ravenhecate]

I met my best friend almost four years ago on another pagan messageboard similar to this one. We hit it off right away and we were romantically involved for a while.

He was living in Dubai at the time we met and as a pagan, he was unable to discuss his religion with the people around him. He was very lonely, far away from home (he was originally from the UK), and desperate to talk to someone. After a few months of emailing each other, we started talking on Skype every day and our conversations would last for 3 or 4 hours at a time...sometimes last as long as 8 hours.

In May of 2007, he flew here for a visit, and it was ten of the most wonderful days of my life to that point. We both knew we were very deeply connected, and that connection had been made many lifetimes before this. Even thousands of miles away, we could tell how the other was feeling before we called each other. And actually meeting face-to-face, made the connection even stronger.

On the day before he was to fly back to Dubai, he got a phone call from a higher up in his company, telling him he was being considered for a promotion and that he was needed back in Europe. I knew at that moment that he would take the job. It was a hard decision for him, but in the end he chose his career over me. It wasn't easy for me either, but I did understand. And I promised him that I would still be his friend, no matter what. And we are still very very close to this day.

Several months after my friend went back to Dubai, I was introduced to another man by a friend of mine. We started dating and it wasn't too long until we were engaged. We married on Nov 8, 2008. My friend, who now lives in Sweden, flew here again to attend our wedding.

I am deliriously, and happily married, and my husband is the best man on the planet. And I am lucky enough to have the second best man on the planet as my best friend. The two men in my life get along very well, and there is no jealousy between them. I've learned in the past few years that even though I know that my friend is indeed my soulmate, he was not the perfect man for me. It's not that I didn't love him, or he wasn't a good man, but he wasn't right for me. He did me a great service by letting me go, and I was able to find the man who WAS right for me.

I guess that some people are caught up in the idea that someone being your "soulmate" means that person is the "perfect" mate. That isn't always the case.

[Traumwandlerin]

Wow

That actually was quite enlightening. Thanks

[Celtic_Luna]

Thank you ravenhecate.

That is a wonderful post and is not only informative but heartwarming too.

[sweetfairish]

Thanks so much for sharing this . A really sweet story . I'm also looking for my soulmate and this is good to know.

[Ember Nightwolf]

I agree, it was beautiful. This has given me some hope, and probably to others who have problems which have nothing to do with emotion and feelings for there soulmate, thank you for sharing it with us.

[solomia]

that was so wonderful to read thank you for sharing that

I was wondering is there a spell you can use to find out who you're meant to be with? if it's possible?

[Ligia]

I think that's one of the most beautiful things about soulmates. In this life time, at least as far as you've come, it wasn't meant to be. The timing wasn't right, or the situations weren't compatable. But either way, maybe in the next life time you will be meant to love each other in every way possible. I guess what I'm saying is that your soulmate will always be just that. And one day, when it is right, when it is ready, you'll be together. Until then, I'm certainly very glad you've found a true love for this life.

--Ligia

[luckimmortal]

I find my self in the same exact situation, but the soulmate who is supposed to be the final one, is the one far from me but with a husband. who Im jealous of. our "skpying" would be like dream magic. but i dont want to communicate with her even though its very clear to me Im the right one for her and her husband now is her soul mate for this time, and when the time is right we will be right for each other.

Now am I wrong for being jealous, even though, the fact that i wont get over her other relationship annoys her, so she annoys me by rubbing it in my face from time to time.. uhm yea I used to believe in soul mates but im not so sure anymore, but i dont want to be alone foreve either, just this whole soulmate idea with being in love with two people is really confusing and depressing me, and if you check out my suicide thread post "leaving on your own terms".... The scenario youve posted is exaclty what im talking about, only she "flew back to work" and im stuck looking for somone new, however she wants to skype with me and be with him @ the same time. the thought of marrying her makes me naucious, but if i did, and the old guy came anywhere near our wedding .... you get the idea... any advice?