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Is It Wrong to Just Be Solitary?

PostPosted: Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:48 pm
by Klia
Hello everyone!

I am very new to this forum so please excuse me if this topic has been posted before.

I was wondering if it would be weird to only practice wicca as a solitary practitioner. I know there are covens I can join and meet up with people to practice rituals and stuff. But what if I prefer practicing alone in my own sacred circle? Would I be missing out on truly worshipping the religion in its fullest sense?

Thank you.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 7:14 am
by loona wynd
Klia wrote:Hello everyone!

I am very new to this forum so please excuse me if this topic has been posted before.

I was wondering if it would be weird to only practice wicca as a solitary practitioner. I know there are covens I can join and meet up with people to practice rituals and stuff. But what if I prefer practicing alone in my own sacred circle? Would I be missing out on truly worshiping the religion in its fullest sense?

Thank you.

This is a good question. The answer is no there is nothing wrong with being a solitary practitioner. Wicca has developed traditions for the solitary practitioner. There are some traditions and types of ritual experiences that you will be denied not working in a circle but you have access to other mysteries and experiences, You must also remember that all coven practitioners also have their own solitary practice which could be vastly different then the Coven practice.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 7:32 am
by Echo_of_shadows
Both solitary practice and coven work have their own pros and cons that are ever changing based on many things like who the practitioner is, where they are in their magickal studies, where they are in their own personal life, etc. There are as many answers to that question as there are people that have asked it, but the one universal truth that applies to each seeker is the truth that lies deep within themselves. If working with others is what you're comfortable with, go for it. If working alone is more your forte, that's a fine choice. I don't think there is any "wrong" or "weird" way to go about spiritually.
I have experience in both situations, and I have found that being a solitary practitioner is what works for me. No one else's schedule to follow, no need to fake nice to people you can't stand, no need to share the cakes and ale. ;)
No one has the right answer to this except your own heart.

Bright Blessings on your path,
Echo

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:59 pm
by Vervain
I enjoy working with other witches when I can but have never practiced in a formal coven environment. I am open to the idea of joining or starting a coven, but I like the creative freedom that solitary work offers and wouldn't want to sacrifice that for coven practice.

If you only want to practice individually, that's perfectly fine, and no one has the right to make you feel inferior for that.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:06 pm
by Klia
Gosh you guys are so helpful! Maybe 'wrong' was the wrong word to use (no pun intended). I just wanted to make sure that it doesn't look bad for a Wiccan to not want to be part of covens. I like Echo_of_Shadow's quote saying you don't have to fake trying to get along with people! Everyone can come at this religion their own way. That's one thing that really drew me in. I don't need to go to church and talk to someone or sing songs in a crowd - we can be independent people with the same goals and beliefs. Perhaps the best way is to just try it out and see if it's my thing.

Thank you all for your replies. I'm glad that it's ok to do things alone. And I love that Wicca can be as independent as possible.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 7:19 pm
by Vervain
If you try to come off like you know that being solitary is better, but you've never actually been in a coven or practiced with others, THAT can look bad--making as if you have experience you don't always makes you look bad. But if you're honest about what you've done and what you haven't, practicing solitary doesn't look bad. If you have experience and your opinions are founded and you remain humble (this goes for solitary witches AND thrice-initiated long-standing high priestess sorceress queens :P ), then no one should think poorly of you. I'm not guaranteeing no one is going to say your opinion isn't valid because you've never been in a coven or been initiated, but feel safe in the knowledge that anyone bigoted enough to say such a thing is hardly worth listening to.

I hope I haven't offended anyone in this post--I wasn't sure of less astringent ways to word this and was simply trying to make a point, I hope it was effective.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 11:37 pm
by Klia
I guess the word 'wrong' is the wrong word (no pun intended). I should probably see what it's all about first. I'm not trying to bash it, just a loner. The experience would probably be for the best just to see who/what is out there for a newbie.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:54 am
by Vervain
I recommend witchvox.com for networking and info. It's always good to seek out new sources of knowledge--you do what feels right.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Thu Oct 24, 2013 8:00 am
by Xiao Rong
It seems that the vast majority of us start out as solitaries, finding witchcraft through books and stuff (since most of us don't grow up in families that are Wiccan or Pagan to begin with), practicing alone, and establishing our beliefs and practices. Then some of us transition to working in groups quite naturally, or at least trying to connect with a larger group. For a lot of folks (especially the younger crowd), this means reaching out to people online (like you are now!).

Klia wrote:I don't need to go to church and talk to someone or sing songs in a crowd - we can be independent people with the same goals and beliefs


Klia, I think one thing to keep in mind is the difference between groups of people and feeling the need to conform, in belief or practice. Pagans, broadly speaking, tend to value independence because most come from other religious institutions that they felt were too narrow or dogmatic. So Pagan gatherings tend to be pretty considerate of the fact that the term "Pagan" encompasses quite a wide umbrella, and that there are a lot of different paths (although the same might not be true of a coven, where everyone shares a practice).

I will say, though, that some things are easier to do in a group; as a solitary, you have to have a lot of discipline and drive. Speaking as a solitary who is only just starting to reach out to a (real-life!) group, sometimes you just can't experience as much without participating in a larger community (for the same reason that it's harder to get an education just by reading books alone - you can, but sometimes it helps to have a teacher, or people to bounce ideas off of).

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Thu Oct 24, 2013 4:12 pm
by Klia
You're right Xiao Rong. I think maybe I've been too stand offish about finding a coven around my town. I started on this forum because I am so new to Wicca and my Pagan beliefs. Talking to people on this forum definitely helps me out. This was the first step to get a greater idea of everything. Once I get more into this and have a better understanding, I will try to branch out. I'm still trying to come out of my shell ha. This may be a lame comparison, but it's sort of like learning a new language. You really have to study it by yourself or with a few people before you immerse yourself into the culture/language with thousands of people speaking that language. Your idea of having a 'teacher' is a good one.

Thanks for the advice!

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Thu Oct 24, 2013 4:32 pm
by Xiao Rong
No problem! It's okay - I was very much like that initially - still working on coming out of my shell, really. I do know what you mean about learning a new language (it wasn't until like 2 years into my studies that I found out how to pronounce Samhain!) But definitely take your time - you have your whole life to figure out your path!

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:29 pm
by Vervain
Xiao Rong wrote:I do know what you mean about learning a new language (it wasn't until like 2 years into my studies that I found out how to pronounce Samhain!)


I first read the word "Samhain" in 2003.
Said "Sam-hayne" for 6 months.
Said "Saw-vayne" for the last 9 years.
Literally just started saying "Sah-wen" a year ago.

People who read far more than converse with other Pagans, you are not alone.

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:32 pm
by Xiao Rong
People who read far more then converse with other Pagans, you are not alone.


Hear, hear!

(I still say "Sam-hayne" in my head ....... )

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:13 pm
by Klia
Oh my gosh, me too!! Now I'm wondering if I'm pronouncing everything else wrong!

Besom is pronounced Bee-sum, right??

Re: Is it 'wrong' to be only solitary?

PostPosted: Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:19 pm
by Vervain
I say it more like Bee-zum, but that doesn't mean I'm right.

This seems to be pretty accurate, though. http://www.howjsay.com/