Scorpio Love..Long
Posted: Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:17 am
Can anyone help me with a Scorpio? I have a perplexing situation. My first love was a Scorpio..I am a Leo. I'm not very well versed in astrology..but I have studied it a bit. I know how Scorpios are. They like to hide their true feelings..but they feel deeply when in love.
This is the hardest part for me to write..but I have not been able to shake it or let it clear my head..my gut feeling is so strong. I've had the ability to feel things before they happen. I had this right before my boyfriend took his own life..something I can explain later. My instinct is strong..however I take a blind eye to things at times to. I gravitate towards troubled souls..tortured souls all the time. I seem to attract them as well. I met this man two years ago..when I first laid eyes on him it was immediate. Not so much an instant attraction..but an instant something. He pursused me heavily in the beginning but he was married. So, I tried to stay away from him. I think in the beginning he was just out for one thing..but I never gave that to him and simply acted as his friend. I noticed a change in him where he used to come at me with confidence..then after time and some seperation he became more shy with me. More nervous around me when he tried to get me to see him outside of the work enviorment. We talked about our connection..it was so strong that a person, a younger person noticed it way before we did when she said outwardly that we belonged together..at that time we hadn't even really began our friendship. But she just bolted out this message with such conviction it took me aback...anyways..He would always stare at me..deep piercing eyes..I would look back as I was walking away and he'd be staring at me. It got to be too much for me..he'd blow hot and cold all the time. He'd act like he liked me and then whenever I'd try to get closer (not physically) just mentalll he'd pull away. I felt tremendous guilt for caring so much for him given his situation..I'd walk away too..but we'd always find a way back to one another. Now, we no longer work together and the last time I saw him we said we would finally, finally meet alone. Something we had both been hoping for..This is how it worked in the past..if I saw him..If I contacted him..he'd respond. Sometimes he would disappear on me and I'd never hear from him for weeks..and if I reached out..he'd respond back. I always went looking for him..he mentioned before how he's scared..he can't help his feelings for me and he wasn't looking for this. I don't know why he has turned my world so upside down. I can't stop thinking about him..
To wrap this up..I stopped. The last time I saw him we had made those plans. He was going out of town and said he would be back on this day. I usually show up for events that he was at..and I never did. I stopped. I just walked away and didn't look back. My feelings for him were far too intense and given his situation I knew I could not bear the guilt. He has never tried to contact me. Not once. And I'm shattered. Do Scorpio men when they have true feelings..do they go silent? Do they disappear or was this all a game? Were our feelings for each other real?
I know there was something there..but we each seemed to run from it. I think it was much harder for him to understand how he felt about me..he never really told me..just would say he missed me. I've always wondered and waited if the day would come that he would just break down and tell me..but I cannot or willnot contact him again..even though I want to. Why do I have such a strong feeling for this person? Why won't it go away? Our connection was so intense at times..and we were unable to truly act on it.
Has anyone dealt with a Scorpio like this before? And should I just find a way to move on? Get him out of my head? How do you do that? It's been about 4 months since we have seen each other.
Sorry so long...
This is the hardest part for me to write..but I have not been able to shake it or let it clear my head..my gut feeling is so strong. I've had the ability to feel things before they happen. I had this right before my boyfriend took his own life..something I can explain later. My instinct is strong..however I take a blind eye to things at times to. I gravitate towards troubled souls..tortured souls all the time. I seem to attract them as well. I met this man two years ago..when I first laid eyes on him it was immediate. Not so much an instant attraction..but an instant something. He pursused me heavily in the beginning but he was married. So, I tried to stay away from him. I think in the beginning he was just out for one thing..but I never gave that to him and simply acted as his friend. I noticed a change in him where he used to come at me with confidence..then after time and some seperation he became more shy with me. More nervous around me when he tried to get me to see him outside of the work enviorment. We talked about our connection..it was so strong that a person, a younger person noticed it way before we did when she said outwardly that we belonged together..at that time we hadn't even really began our friendship. But she just bolted out this message with such conviction it took me aback...anyways..He would always stare at me..deep piercing eyes..I would look back as I was walking away and he'd be staring at me. It got to be too much for me..he'd blow hot and cold all the time. He'd act like he liked me and then whenever I'd try to get closer (not physically) just mentalll he'd pull away. I felt tremendous guilt for caring so much for him given his situation..I'd walk away too..but we'd always find a way back to one another. Now, we no longer work together and the last time I saw him we said we would finally, finally meet alone. Something we had both been hoping for..This is how it worked in the past..if I saw him..If I contacted him..he'd respond. Sometimes he would disappear on me and I'd never hear from him for weeks..and if I reached out..he'd respond back. I always went looking for him..he mentioned before how he's scared..he can't help his feelings for me and he wasn't looking for this. I don't know why he has turned my world so upside down. I can't stop thinking about him..
To wrap this up..I stopped. The last time I saw him we had made those plans. He was going out of town and said he would be back on this day. I usually show up for events that he was at..and I never did. I stopped. I just walked away and didn't look back. My feelings for him were far too intense and given his situation I knew I could not bear the guilt. He has never tried to contact me. Not once. And I'm shattered. Do Scorpio men when they have true feelings..do they go silent? Do they disappear or was this all a game? Were our feelings for each other real?
I know there was something there..but we each seemed to run from it. I think it was much harder for him to understand how he felt about me..he never really told me..just would say he missed me. I've always wondered and waited if the day would come that he would just break down and tell me..but I cannot or willnot contact him again..even though I want to. Why do I have such a strong feeling for this person? Why won't it go away? Our connection was so intense at times..and we were unable to truly act on it.
Has anyone dealt with a Scorpio like this before? And should I just find a way to move on? Get him out of my head? How do you do that? It's been about 4 months since we have seen each other.
Sorry so long...