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Scorpio Love..Long

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Scorpio Love..Long

Postby lavendergirl » Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:17 am

Can anyone help me with a Scorpio? I have a perplexing situation. My first love was a Scorpio..I am a Leo. I'm not very well versed in astrology..but I have studied it a bit. I know how Scorpios are. They like to hide their true feelings..but they feel deeply when in love.

This is the hardest part for me to write..but I have not been able to shake it or let it clear my head..my gut feeling is so strong. I've had the ability to feel things before they happen. I had this right before my boyfriend took his own life..something I can explain later. My instinct is strong..however I take a blind eye to things at times to. I gravitate towards troubled souls..tortured souls all the time. I seem to attract them as well. I met this man two years ago..when I first laid eyes on him it was immediate. Not so much an instant attraction..but an instant something. He pursused me heavily in the beginning but he was married. So, I tried to stay away from him. I think in the beginning he was just out for one thing..but I never gave that to him and simply acted as his friend. I noticed a change in him where he used to come at me with confidence..then after time and some seperation he became more shy with me. More nervous around me when he tried to get me to see him outside of the work enviorment. We talked about our connection..it was so strong that a person, a younger person noticed it way before we did when she said outwardly that we belonged together..at that time we hadn't even really began our friendship. But she just bolted out this message with such conviction it took me aback...anyways..He would always stare at me..deep piercing eyes..I would look back as I was walking away and he'd be staring at me. It got to be too much for me..he'd blow hot and cold all the time. He'd act like he liked me and then whenever I'd try to get closer (not physically) just mentalll he'd pull away. I felt tremendous guilt for caring so much for him given his situation..I'd walk away too..but we'd always find a way back to one another. Now, we no longer work together and the last time I saw him we said we would finally, finally meet alone. Something we had both been hoping for..This is how it worked in the past..if I saw him..If I contacted him..he'd respond. Sometimes he would disappear on me and I'd never hear from him for weeks..and if I reached out..he'd respond back. I always went looking for him..he mentioned before how he's scared..he can't help his feelings for me and he wasn't looking for this. I don't know why he has turned my world so upside down. I can't stop thinking about him..

To wrap this up..I stopped. The last time I saw him we had made those plans. He was going out of town and said he would be back on this day. I usually show up for events that he was at..and I never did. I stopped. I just walked away and didn't look back. My feelings for him were far too intense and given his situation I knew I could not bear the guilt. He has never tried to contact me. Not once. And I'm shattered. Do Scorpio men when they have true feelings..do they go silent? Do they disappear or was this all a game? Were our feelings for each other real?

I know there was something there..but we each seemed to run from it. I think it was much harder for him to understand how he felt about me..he never really told me..just would say he missed me. I've always wondered and waited if the day would come that he would just break down and tell me..but I cannot or willnot contact him again..even though I want to. Why do I have such a strong feeling for this person? Why won't it go away? Our connection was so intense at times..and we were unable to truly act on it.

Has anyone dealt with a Scorpio like this before? And should I just find a way to move on? Get him out of my head? How do you do that? It's been about 4 months since we have seen each other.

Sorry so long...
lavendergirl
 

Postby lavendergirl » Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:24 am

I wanted to add to this...I don't mess with married men. Period. So, that is why this thing has messed with me so much. Normally, I would never have let my feelings get this far. But they did. I feel so ashamed at times that I care for this person and know..know that he is unavailable to me. So, I think why did he come into my life then? What lesson was I supposed to learn from this? All I've had now is pain for realizing that this deep connection and ache for someone will go away. Why are you so drawn to the souls of people you cannot have? What is the purspose?

I'd like to figure that one out. Maybe it will help me process this and finally set him free...I want to be free of this pain..of missing something I cannot have. We both just stopped..and it feels weird that there was no resolution. No goodbyes..no nothing. I need some kind of closure on this Scorpio man.
lavendergirl
 

Postby Alchemist of Blue Roses » Wed Jul 15, 2009 10:14 am

... Scorpios usually never let anyone get close to them... we are very silent people... we have feelings but more than often we are hurt before we can find a way to truly express ourselves... it seems you have hurt him, that's how come he won't talk to you again... the compulsion you felt may have been the natural sexual aura we give off... Scorpios & Leos do not go together. Get over him. As life says, if it was meant to be it was meant to be...


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Postby NightRose » Wed Jul 15, 2009 10:47 am

Scorpio males are very passionate, though slow to reveal their inner feelings for fear of being hurt. They can have quick tempers, but these also hide behind the mask they put up towards the world. He enjoys mysteries and has high standards. They do, however, tend to draw women to them with a great magnetism, and are very sexual creatures.

Scorpio and Leo are actually a reasonable match, barring any serious jealousy issues. Scorpios, especially the males, can get jealous easily, and the Leo's need for admiration can cause him to become upset if she seeks it from others. As long as both parties are willing to make an effort and work to find a middle ground, it can be a very rewarding relationship.

As to your situation, I'll say this: a man who is willing to leave/cheat on his wife for you is almost never a man worth pursuing. The old adage "once a cheater, always a cheater" comes through in a lot of such situations. Do you want to be with a man who would cheat on his wife? Do you want to later possibly marry a man who cheats on his wife? And do you want to be with a man who randomly disappears for long periods of time and doesn't attempt to contact you? I think you can do better. Scorpios are mysterious and extremely attractive, and you're feeling his pull. But this one doesn't sound like the best match for you, in my opinion.
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Postby lavendergirl » Wed Jul 15, 2009 11:29 am

No. There were many red flags with him that I looked away from. He would leave me a lot. So, when I finally tired of that and walked away..I felt like I had no choice. He's a very troubled man..but for some reason I've always found them challenging. But..the cheating part was something I was never comfortable with.. I was just unsettled with this strong desire for him. I'm sure he is like this with many women and I do feel grateful that he never got to me that way. I kept it at bay for a long time..but I do miss is our friendship and care..I do bring myself back by remiding myself of all the times that he would just ignore me..I'd email him something..and wouldn't hear from him for weeks. One time I emailed him wishing him a Happy Birthday and he never responded..and when he did he put it all on me saying he hadn't heard from me in awhile. He could never take responsibility for his actions with me. It was always me acting strange..not him. Well...I finally just found the courage to walk away.

And I guess it's just difficult getting over that attraction that still lingers with me. I still do believe he felt something for me..just never could tell me.
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