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Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

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Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Oct 25, 2017 3:27 am

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I thought this would be a nifty place to put my thoughts and dump things that inspire me. :)
I already have a journal and a Book of Mirrors type of binder as well as a blog, but this blog in particular I think will come in handy to jot down things quickly so I can have an at-a-glance of what I have going on magically that is more in-depth than going to my Witches' Datebook and less wordy than wading through pages and pages of writing in my handwritten journal and Binder of Shadows.
:fairy:
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An old picture of my Alar by Avalon Ravenmoon

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A Brush with Magic by Lisa Parker
My favourite image of a black cat because he reminds me of my cat. :3
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Oct 25, 2017 2:11 pm

Last week was the week of the new moon.
Leading up to the new moon, aside from writing a ritual for Samhain 2017 and small spells for this week, I haven't been entirely active magically.
I'd done my Intention Ritual with the Green Witch tarot on the new moon last Thursday (October 19th) which I shared in my Internet BoS http://everythingunderthemoon.net/forum/avalon-ravenmoon-internet-bos-t36002.html. And in that spirit I've been spending a lot of time with the cards.
And earlier this week I did some talisman spells, a clarity charm and a serenity charm, to keep me focused on my goals and calm amidst turbulence.

This week has been a quiet one. I haven't done much in the way of daily ritual. There has been constant communication with goddess but it has a different tone at the moment. I feel this is in line with my clarity spell. I need to sit in quiet and focus on what I need to do, which is paint for Her, so that it was I've been doing. I do set up sacred space to paint but it's not ritualistic.
I haven't been doing my morning devotionals because partner has been sleeping in due to all-nighters working and I don't want to disturb him. I do crave quiet time at the altar so I will be doing that today in addition to finishing up the painting I'm on at the moment.

Speaking of painting, I had bought some clear xmas ornaments to make into Witch Balls. I'd originally wanted to make a healing one, but I got two, and I feel called to make one for painting - it would be for healing the muse, for creative flow, abundance and focus. So that's on my witchy to-do list. I might end up doing this as part of my Samhain ritual, since reinviting art into my life and going full force is my goal for the new year.
I also want to try out the reiki circlecasting in ritual so that's on my to-do list too.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Thu Oct 26, 2017 10:40 am

I ended up making my witch ball yesterday during my devotional ritual. It is charging at my healing shrine and I will be spelling it on Samhain or the full moon following, whichever I end up feeling more called to. I will probably share a picture here afterwards.

I thought I would write my daily draw here. I used some oracle decks that I haven't used in a while.
The messages: Illumination and growth
The area of life they pertain to: Hopefulness, joy and playfulness
The guiding forces/the helpers: Authenticity and change

The way I see it this message is twofold. On the one hand, illumination, growth, authenticity, change, these words all carry a certain vibration of cutting through bullshit, getting at the truth of the matter.
Meanwhile the area in life they are talking about is one of conquering hopelessness and depression and embracing joy in life in a playful manner.
When I initially drew the cards it sounded like I was going through this transformation because shadows were being brought to light and I was healing, that I should embrace playfulness and joy and the guiding forces will be my will to change and the desire to be true to myself.
Looking at the cards a second time I see that perhaps I am too playful now and need to get real. Generally when the cards say something that can be taken either direction I try to go the middle ground.

I pulled some cards from my regular oracle deck and they sort of lay out what to do in the situation.
Stay grounded, centered, and protect self magically from having my thoughts and feelings overrided by someone elses. and by keeping silent. Meanwhile, stay calm. In my case, this means using my practice to maintain a sense of peace in life while changes happen.
I got a card that has to do with justice in a lot of ways. What I put out comes back. In this case I had a feeling it has to do with not only my interactions with others but work as well (what I put in I get out). The cards say to go at things from a place of love, and remember that I am loved and supported by Goddess and my loved ones.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:06 am

Yay Samhain season is officially upon us!

I drew many cards today that I wrote about in my journal (er, yesterday, since it's past midnight). In addition I had a mini ritual in the morning honouring and feeling the presence of my ancestors. It was the first time I really honestly felt there presence (other than some occasions in the cemetary or dreams - I haven't openly called to them). It was quite comforting and I hope to do more ancestorwork.

I wasn't sure if I was going to do anything for Halloween, but I wanted to dress up so I donned all my witchy garb and spent some time doing my makeup for the day. We didn't get any kids at the door so I'm going to have to decide what to do with the treat bags I put together.

It wasn't until much later I did my Samhain ritual I had written. There was some ad-lib too, which I always enjoy. I like doing intuitive rituals if I can, I just like writing down generally what I want to do in ritual so I have a "safety net" so to speak. It helps me to keep a focus for the ritual and also it makes it feel more special when I think there's been some level of planning involved.

It was nice. I felt very balanced and harmonious in circle, whereas the rest of the day I was feeling a little bit tired (probably from the sugar tbh). I enchanted one of my pendants to aid in intuiting and connecting to the goddess, a spell that I will likely continue until the full moon. I also wrote down some goals and things I want to cut out of my life, which again will culminate in a burning ritual come the November full moon. And of course my witch ball is now complete and just hanging above my altar at the moment.

Thought I'd share a recent photo of my altar all lit up for Samhain 2017. Samhain blessings to all!

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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Nov 15, 2017 12:18 pm

I've been a little bit MIA online because I've started a new venture. It's been going pretty good.

As of late I've been experimenting with incorporating different energies I'd been wanting to work with but hadn't quite gotten into before. Noticing lots of healing happening. Also tweaking my daily practice for "Winter" mode, I suppose you could say.

It's coming up to the new moon so I've been having some interesting dreams. Last night I dreamt a guide gave me a large sum of cash and I burst into tears of gratitude. I don't think I've ever had a dream like that where someone is so generous and the feeling of gratitude seeped into my day once I woke up. It was an interesting feeling. I also dreamt some advice about reading with oracle cards which clarified some things but was also interesting because I don't usually dream about directions/guidance in such an obvious way.

Semi-related to the craft (at least in my eyes) - I'm doing my Crystal Reiki Attunement tonight. I already do reiki and use crystals but using them together will be semi-new to me.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Tue Nov 21, 2017 2:27 am

Just after Samhain I noticed an big shift in my practice. This was around the time I started working with different energies as well.

It was different being called by these new beings. I've interpreted energies/spirits before, and worked ritually with elementals, but I haven't had what I would call strong experiences with them in quite a while. I was pretty resistant in the beginning, but I've been experimenting with angels and it's been enlightening. I had my reservations about them before, no doubt due to some issues I still had with the religion I grew up in. Now I feel more open to exploring Spirit in whatever way it comes through to me. I feel like this has expanded the way I may choose to work with deity as well. Despite being a pantheist, I was pretty strictly involved with Celtic and more specifically Welsh deities.

The deities who have called me and guided me will forever be important to me, but I can see myself allowing Spirit to teach me in a less restrictive way, sort of inviting a more creative approach to my interaction and connection with Deity. As always I remain to the idea of matron/patron deities.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Jan 17, 2018 2:29 pm

I realized I haven't yet got my journal out today to write about the dream I had last night! I didn't think I would be able to forget it because it was pretty vivid but it is starting to fade away now so I'd better get it out.
There was an old, rotting building. The interior was mouldy and decaying, but the exterior was a huge medieval castle. When I think about it, I'm relieved that I finally dreamt about a different location other than my childhood home/parents house.
I was in this decaying castle with many people from my life - friends, family, coworkers, and we were hiding from a beast that was trying to marry one of us. We'd managed to fight it off and squash it under a drawbridge.
There was a bit about family - but more so my ancestors. It was brought to our attention that my grandfather on my father's side had been quite abusive. We had a photograph of him in a highback chair with two great danes. We compared it to another photo, I don't know if it was supposed to be a great-great-grandfather or some other ancestor, or if it was in fact the beast I mentioned earlier, but they were sitting in a similar pose just with different dogs at their heels.
There was a segment of my dream where I'd been trying to make a road trip to Grand Falls or even PEI before a work day. I know I dreamt about it because I was thinking of going to see a friend after work this Friday, but I have an early shift, so there's anxiety about getting where I need to be on time. I often dream about struggling to get to work on time when I know I have an early shift, because there's a chance I might sleep through my alarms because I'm so tired or that I can't make it on time because the buses aren't quite running yet at such an hour.

Here are what some dream interpretation sites say about different symbols in this dream.
Great Danes:
Great Danes symbolize an easy going, strong-willed nature. He may appear in your dreams to remind you not to let people walk all over you. You do not have to say yes or do everything someone else asks or expects from you. You are a strong, independent thinker. Avoid being influenced by others manipulations. You are empowered to achieve anything your heart desires.

Seeing a Great Dane asleep can indicate you need to wake up and focus on what you need to do to reach for success. What do you dream of? Why do you find it hard to focus?

A harlequin Great Dane in your dreams may symbolize the current changes in your life. His message is that these changes are good for you and everything will soon settle down. Embrace them to make the changes work for you.


Castle and "Beauty and the Beast" Marriage:
There are various dream interpretations about a castle. A fairytale life of achieved dreams, being confined to what others desire. Castles represent wealth and family. The fact that the castle was decaying on the inside and fine on the outside means my psyche disagrees with keeping up with appearances just to appease those around me. The beast attacking the castle also signifies being trapped, as well as acknowledging that the "polite society" and sophisticated personas I try to present to the world are not working out for me - the wild part of me desires to break free - to marry me in a sense.

The overall theme of the dream is to do with dreams of career success and social acceptance. A wild part of me always wants to break free, but I feel my world will crumble if I let it, because I want to build a life for myself where I can own a home, have a family. Inside, I believe it is folly, hypocritical, to try to live a double life. I obviously struggle to accept the realities of the adult world - the sacrifices it may take to make your dreams reality, like working a job that is not ideal but pays enough that I can pursue my favourite ventures like having the free time to paint or devote myself to my practice. There is a part of me that doesn't understand how my parents and grandparents had their careers, finances, and housing situations work out so smoothly and then here I am worried I may never own a home. Then it comes down to, do I really want to own a home? I've always wanted to have a house just outside my hometown, or further in the country. That is something I do actually want. I don't mind the simple small town or country life. The thing is I have some ideas of how I can someday achieve that life but I'm not sure how many of them are truly things I want to do or if they are simply options because I know that not only may they allow me to make my dreams reality but they will sound nice to/impress my future in-laws and peers and such. I don't think that in itself is inherently bad so long as I do have some kind of interest in my chosen path, but I worry about making a "wrong decision". I don't actually believe there is a wrong decision, but I do think there is one that will resonate best with all of me, and I'm still trying to figure out what that is. Occasionally I get divine messages about it, I can envision what it is. But then I second-guess. Maybe that's just my mind playing tricks. People always say follow my heart. My heart says something other than the messages I hear - however that thing is far less practical, at least short-term. I can see it working out long term so long as I have another career. In any case I'm definitely rambling at this point.
I think this dream needs further investigation. I'll be using the Mystic Dreamer tarot to do a dream interpretation spread to further decipher any messages about what to do in relation to this topic, and I might do some other spreads and possibly spellwork for clarity and such as well.
Blessings.
Avalon Ravenmoon
 
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Tue May 22, 2018 10:09 am

I've been mia for the past few months. I started doing daily draws and readings online for a while there. And while it was fulfilling, I've been wanting to focus more on my craft and my personal relationships, not just with loved ones but my divination tools which have been neglected.
A part of my attempt to connect and savour more, and just overall experience deep gratitude for my life and the things in it, is to really attempt to connect with decks and tools I already own (without lusting after new pretty shinies, which is oh so tempting when money burns a hole in the pocket).
I have a few tarot decks, each one I connect to in a different way. Specifically, I want to connect with The Tarot of Vampyres which my partner bought for me 3 or 4 years ago whilst we were on a date. This deck is an interesting one. It speaks to me immediately without my having to turn to the guidebook, yet when I do choose to read the guidebook, it practically shouts true to me! I stopped using it for a while because I wasn't vibing with the dark artwork at the time and I wanted a deck that was more challenging.
Yesterday as an attempt to reconnect with this deck again I did a cleansing and consecrating ritual, followed by a deck interview spread. The interview revealed that this deck wants to offer everything I desire from a tarot deck.

Today as I shuffled the cards, the Empress came out. She signifies me right now, and my attempts to nurture my relationships and manifest the life I desire. The Empress reminds me of Mother Earth, mother nature, of a sexy fruitfull goddess. This card is encouraging me to connect with this deck, connect with my loved ones, connect with my gods, and relish in the abundance that is all around and within me.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Thu May 24, 2018 9:54 am

A Dream Interpretation Spread

I decided to this spread because I had a dream with imagery that deeply impacted me. While I won't go into the details of the dream too much, it did give me a lingering feeling as I woke up. I often have dreams of nostalgia that romanticize my past and leave me melancholy, feeling helplessness and longing.
I think this spread really helped me put my head back on straight after this dream.
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I'm using this spread by seven-0f-spirals http://witchoncampus.tumblr.com/post/136005059153/seven-0f-spirals-ever-have-a-dream-that-you
1: Why am I having this dream?
This tells you why you are having the dream in question. Maybe it is an underlying emotional issue, or it is merely something that interests you.

2: What does this dream have to tell me?
This is the overall message that the dream is trying to tell you.

3: What is the hidden message in this dream?
This is what the dream is really trying to tell you, but is hidden underneath the big picture.

4: Is there a lesson/advice to be learned from this dream?
Many believe that our dreams are trying to tell us about our conscious life. This card will tell you if there’s anything that you need to learn from this dream right this instant, or if it will come to you in the future.

5: How do I apply the lesson/advice to my waking life?
This will tell you how you should best apply what you learn from the lesson/advice that the dream is giving you.


1. Death - This card signifies the death of the old life. In my dream, I was living again in a romanticized version of my youth/hometown/high school etc. The stores were more mystical and intriguing, catering to my interests in the paranormal and beautiful antiques etc. The guys who seemed unapproachable talked to me. The unapproachable boys are the aspect of the dream that I think was influenced by my life right now, because I'm reading Anne Rice. There was a boy I was friends with in kindergarten but we grew apart as I developed. The only time we really bonded ever again was in 5th or 6th grade when he saw I was reading horror novels provided in the classroom. I'm sure picking up my first horror novel in over a decade is what triggered this dream. (I'm reading the Witching Hour).

2. Queen of Scepters - The dream is telling me while I may romanticize my previous life, I am a much more interesting and developed person now. The Queen of Scepters to me is confident in her will, she owns "it". She is water and fire - combining the dreams/goals/desire for beauty and the finer things in life with the confidence she can have and fully enjoy those things. Waking up from the dream I had, I felt nostalgic for a time and place that never existed in reality, and that only continues to exist in the dreamtime/astral. This card is a reminder that I create my reality, and I have more power now to create the life I want for myself now.

3. Temperance - The hidden message from the dream is to evaluate things objectively and do the inner alchemy work that is needed to make the best of the current situation. When I yearn for a time that never was and things that never were, what is it in my life that I'm really wishing for? Consider that the past of my dreams is not the same as the actual past, and also consider the concept of time itself. I am a happier version of who I was then, better in every way - mentally, spiritually, physically. Aside from that, the core of who I am is not any different than it was then. "Change" is an illusion, growth and alchemy is the reality.
The Temperance card is trying very hard to show me that I am ever present in the process of synthesizing the past with the future. There is nothing to mourn because this process of synthesization cannot exist without the past, now can only be a product of what has led to now. Considering this may allow me to come to peace with nostalgia and dreams like this.

4. Five of Skulls - The lesson or advice to be learned from this, overall, is to not dwell on feelings of draining, of loss. Know there is a solution to waves of nostalgia, and it's all about appreciating in the gift of the present. Many people have a relationship or time in their life that they yearn to return to, even to some degree if they claim to be someone who lives fully in the present. This romanticization amplifies when we don't consider our current blessings, or even look forward to new ones yet to come. For example, one small aspect of my dream was a beautiful antique shop. While in my youth I would have appreciated window shopping there, now as an adult, I have the option to actually afford to shop there. Don't let the romantic past or daydreams drain you of your zest for life as it is or can be now.

6 & 7. Nine of Grails and Daughter of Knives - How do I apply this lesson to my waking life? 9 of grails represents appreciation. Appreciation of the past, of the dreams, but especially appreciation for the life manifesting now. Rapture, ecstasy, excitement for what is yet to come. Building joy. Excitement for all the ways that we can create joy in our lives right now. We have so much power to create whatever reality we want.
Daughter of Knives recommends using grounding, matter-of-fact thinking and acting to live in the now and move forward. Instead of dwelling, dwelling, dwelling, the Daughter of Knives encourages me to be introspective and reflect on the purpose of dwelling and realize all that matters now are thoughts and feelings that I can in fact act on now and moving forward.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Tue May 29, 2018 10:11 pm

I just finished a spontaneous solitary full moon ritual at my bedroom Altar. To ground, I'm listening to some of my favourite witchy/pagan chants (Lady of the Flowing Waters by Robert Gass & On the Wings of Song). I feel like this chant and a few others really channel this time in the Wheel of the Year to me. Anything with a soft, feminine, lunar feeling, or magical fae themed music really clicks with me this time of year. Perfect for the Flower Moon!

I didn't have anything planned for the ritual. I started out by clearing the space physically - re-decorating the altar in a way that was simple, practical, and felt right to me. It feels very elegant now, which I think reflects this full moon.
I already showered today so I chose to do a simple cleansing "handwashing" which I sometimes do in place of a bath just to connect with my element, source, and to cleanse and center myself. This is something I learned when I was learning Reiki - they suggest using cold water before and after Reiki to keep the practitioner cleansed and centered.

When I returned to the Altar, I thoroughly cleansed the space with Sage whilst Chanting. I followed up by burning some Palo Santo to encourage positive energy. Then I cleansed and Invoked the Elements. I draw invoking pentagrams at each quarter. Lately for quarter calls/invoking the elements I've been more interested in speaking from the Heart instead of using pre-written calls (even one's I have written - I love writing my own invocations/spells/etc). I find that I tend to call on four archangels, dragons, and/or the guardian spirits of the element. Afterward, I cast a circle.

Then I lit my candles. I typically have a magical working candle that I consecrated to represent the elements of the circle, including Spirit/The All, which I light at the start of any working at the Altar. Then I invoked the God and Goddess, lighting their candles and spending a moment with them, feeling their presence, and drew down the moon.

After a while, I began pulling cards, which I tend to do as another way of communicating with my Gods and Guides (same goes for my set of Runes I made and my pendulum). The overall message of the cards was that the signs I've been receiving are indeed from my Guides and they are helping me to heal and accomplish my goals. I also pulled some runes which supported this message.

When I don't have a magical working planned, I tend to draw a card from one of my two decks that has spells for each card. These two decks are the Enchanted Oracle and the Witchlings deck. I drew Celtic Witch from the Enchanted Oracle, which is a card that beckons one to invoke (or continue invoking) magic in ones daily life. I consider myself an everyday Witch - I do practice one way or another every day. However as of late I've not been doing ritual as often, something I used to do everyday. One of the suggestions that went along with this card is to find a magical symbol that's important to you and that you consider to be your sort of "totem" symbol, and start using the totem daily (either by keeping a picture of it on the altar or wearing it). Immediately I thought of the moon, and luckily I have a Celtic Crescent Moon Charm. I anointed it with lavender oil for healing, protection and magic and with rose oil for the potent power of love - self-love, love in relationships with other people as well as with my Gods and Guides. I set the moon charm on my altar to charge with a candle behind it. To raise energy, I used my singing bowl until I felt myself enter a sort of trance and the energy felt complete.

Finally, I gathered my bowl of crystals and other magical tools to cleanse them thoroughly by sage, and placed them under a window where the moonlight can wash over them.

I sat at the altar a little longer, enjoying the presence of my Gods and Guides. I lit some Moon incense by HEM as an offering. There were some popping sounds coming from my Goddess candle, which tends to be a sign of Hecate's presence. I felt her strongly throughout the whole ritual, and referred to quite a bit without realizing. I will have to do a ritual specifically for connecting with her some day.

And that's that. I thanked everyone and closed circle after snuffing out the candles. It was a lovely, simple ritual, for a spontaneous one. I'm curious what dreams I might have tonight (if I can fall asleep that is!) and I'm in love with my current altar setup.

And if anyone aside from me actually read this (and came this far :shock: ) Blessed Flower Moon!/ And Many Blessed Moons Ahead!! :flyingwitch:
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Tue Jun 12, 2018 4:42 pm

I’ve been drawn to Goddess Morrighan as of late after doing some research into my family name etymology. I found the origins tracing back to Cu Chullain, whose legends involve Her. While their relationship is complex, there’s no denying the interest Morrighan takes in the Hound of Ulster - be it for better or for worse. She calls to him and his denying her results in his undoing - but in a lot of ways, she is the spark that ignites his legacy, regardless. In ways, she makes sure he follows his destiny. Who is he without her? Still a great hero, yes, and still a supposed incarnation of Lugh, who some consider her consort.

I wanted to see where this rabbit hole would take me, and so started researching Morrighan and her aspects more in-depth, as well as her many supposed consorts and familial ties. However, I hit a wall. I realized the only way to really delve deeper at this point is to try to connect with her ritually.

As I’ve been connecting with Morrighan in ritual, I’ve been realizing the many instances where she had been with me throughout my life. When I was very young - no more than 6-years-old - I had a dream about someone I called the Lady of the Lake (which I also later found out was the name of the boat my ancestors owned and sailed to Canada in). Again and again, this figure came up, and I learned about her role in the Arthurian mythos. Some people have drawn parallels between the Lady of the Lake of Arthurian mythos and Morrighan, as well as of course the famous Morgan le Fay.

Later on, I connected with the Morrighan as Goddess Macha. She influenced me deeply and I connected with her as faerie queen and mare mother in my pre-teen years. At the time, I did not know this presence - this Goddess - even had a name, but I recently realized it was Macha.

In my late teens, during a Summer Solstice ritual meditation, I saw Goddess as a solar faerie queen. I believed her to be Aine. Later, of course, I read about many who associate Aine with Morrighan as well.

More recently, I connected to a Goddess figure that called herself Cailleach. Another Morrighanic figure, especially in the more stereotypical sense.

Four years ago, in 2014, I bought a book on the Morrighan. Originally I hadn’t even realized it was about the Morrighan. I bought it because the title intrigued me, and thumbing through I found a couple esbat and sabbat rituals that I really enjoyed. Instead of buying the book I’d originally visited this bookstore for, I bought this book on Morrighan on a whim.

Everything comes back to her in what I consider to be a rather unique way.


When I was thinking of beginning my work with the Morrighan about a year ago, a dying crow had let me care for it in its final hour. When I really started researching the Morrighan’s lore about a week or so ago, I nearly stepped on crow skull that was in a very unusual place...

And today, as I was in circle, performing a ritual to honour and connect with Macha one last time before beginning to connect with Badb, She sent me other signs. For example, the Red candle I lit for her began sparking - but only when songs specifically about her were playing in the background. It gives me goosebumps to think about it.

To me, Macha is about sovereignty especially. Lately she has been speaking to me throughout the day about honouring who I am and letting myself “take up space”. These are things I never before worked on, thought about, etc. but now, with the Morrighan, with Macha, it is my time to learn this lesson. I look forward to learning more about myself, as well as about the Morrighan. I look forward to this journey, and to honouring her further - in perhaps the way that my (possible) ancestor wouldn’t.
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Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Tue Jun 19, 2018 11:09 am

I dreamt about my last serious would-be partner. This was a relationship that was sort of doomed from the start. I was lured in because he acted nice and stuff, but over time his true colours showed. We never actually dated, only played with the idea and he went on to be in a relationship with someone else whom cheated on him and likewise, he had nearly attempted to cheat on with me. Looking back, I may have loved his light, but his darkness overshadowed all else and he was not the guy for me. Not even as a friend. I had to cut him out of my life. Sadly other people went along with him who I would have liked to know more. But ultimately it had to be this way. I was very young and naive with little to no life experience. Without going into too much detail, the whole situation was traumatizing and it happened at a very sensitive time in my life, so naturally, I will occasionally have dreams about this era.
Often I don't care about dreams about this guy, but tonight it stuck with me, because he had been sort of fused with my current partner, giving me strange feelings. What I mean is, the best parts of his personality were fused with my current partner, so I could only see this person as perfect in my eyes.
The dream left a lingering feeling so I decided to do a spread about this with the Heart of Faerie oracle.

I pulled The Faerie of Growth, The Speaker of Truth, and the Queen of Hearth and Home. Finally, I pulled the Magician.
Overall, this guy from my past is one I had to grow away from to experience my personal growth. Being with my current partner has forced me to grow in so many ways, to become the best adult I can be whilst still being true to myself. These were all lessons I could have learned with this ex-friend, only he was teaching me his "lessons" in a much more toxic, more damaging way. They also happened to be the "wrong" lessons for me.
The speaker of truth represents all the parts of myself I inadvertently repressed while I was with this ex-friend. While I hadn't done this on purpose, the relationship only allowed for one small part of myself to show.
The Queen of Hearth and Home represents comfort in a relationship. While excitement and "games" might be fun for a while, I craved a more devoted, deeply loving, in-depth relationship that I could come home too.
Finally, I pulled the Magician. This card represents me and my ability to think and see clearly and then take hold of a situation, which is exactly what I did in the end of that relationship, and what I am continuing to do in my life now.

Thinking about this dream, and doing this spread, I'm alot happier with the choices I'm making now then back then, and I look forward to the future I am creating.
Avalon Ravenmoon
 
Posts: 44
Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 2:42 pm
Location: Ontario, Canada

Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Jul 11, 2018 12:32 am

I've been writing a spell for this coming new moon and I'm very pleased with how it's coming together. I got a bit carried away, as I went from writing a rough intention for the spell to working out a full-blown ritual for this working, before I even got around to divining if it was the right path. I'm quite confident in my spell at this point, but I did decide to do some divination to see if Spirit had anything to add (aside from the inspiration imparted to me through the spellcrafting process).
I drew the Hierophant, the Chariot, and Three of Pentacles. The Hierophant also kept coming up as I was shuffling my deck throughout the evening, so I know there's an extra emphasis there. To me, these cards imply that it's important I follow specific structure and guidelines in working this spell. It means I ought to keep in mind the magical laws and hermetic principles as well as spell working and ritual structure. The chariot encourages me to continue forward in doing this working, while the Three of Pentacles, in this instance, is asking me to craft in a way that really honours myself as well as my deities, and know that with them supporting me, this spell will be a success.
Avalon Ravenmoon
 
Posts: 44
Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 2:42 pm
Location: Ontario, Canada

Re: Ravenmoon's Personal Blog of Shadows

Postby Avalon Ravenmoon » Wed Jul 11, 2018 12:53 am

While I'm online I thought I'd jot down a little tidbit that happened recently during a ritual.
I was feeling confused because of my connection to Morrighan. While I definitely feel connected to her, I really love and resonate with Cerridwen. It was Cerridwen who had gifted me a psychic shield and aids in my psychic abilities...or so I think. It was Cerridwen who appeared to me in recent years in my otherworld journeys. It was Cerridwen who showed me her teeth and her powers to transform one by eating them and rebirthing them shinier than before.
Both Goddesses are shapeshifters, both have mother and crone aspects, both could be considered "dark" goddesses, faerie queens, sorceresses. In my UPG they share other similarities as well.
There are other goddesses I have connections with, who work with me but these are the two I connect with more easily and that I feel more drawn to.
I used to try to pin-point their relationship to me, tried to fit them in boxes like mother and grandmother. I wanted it to be simple to fit them into my small way of thinking about ritual and how I would work with two different goddesses from two different pantheons at the same time. (irish and welsh - both being celtic, but still...)
But of course, I can't do that.
I always knew that simply wasn't going to work out, especially not with two shapeshifter goddesses.
Well, during ritual where I invited the two of them I had a candle lit. Unfortunately I don't remember the details surrounding this candle other than it was meant to represent one of them - I think Cerridwen. The other candles I had lit for different shapeshiftery aspects of these goddesses had died down and this lilac coloured candle at the center of the altar was the last one.Often during ritual, there is a point where I get an impluse to start scrying, either by smoke or flame or what have you. So I began scrying and getting into that receptive state. The flame was eating away at the wick, but it wasn't quite finished yet. Suddenly, there was a crackle, and the flame split into two separate flames. I didn't have to sit there wondering what it meant because in that same instance I heard them, "We are sisters." and I knew their relationship to each other and to me.
Avalon Ravenmoon
 
Posts: 44
Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 2:42 pm
Location: Ontario, Canada


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