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Path of the Hex

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Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Sat Dec 08, 2018 9:07 am

I thought I would start to write down my experiences and random thought for future reference and fun. :) Perhaps someone wants to chime in to say something too.

I'm lagging behind my plan about my Book of Shadows, big time. Last time I wrote something was around springtime. Its no problem though as in the meantime I have been gathering things to write, I've been doing spells which I wasn't familiar with and so on. I'm thinking of getting back into writing soon and doing a dedication ritual next spring, I started a symbolic year and a day when I started to write my book.

Speaking of which, last spring was when my long interest into witchcraft got onto another level, being serious about it. I have been into this for a long time, since I was a teenager, but never got into it the way I'm now. I have also travelled a very dark and dangerous path for years when I was younger. Luckily those days are over. I think of it now as a growing experience, very important to me as how can you avoid "evil" if you don't know it at all? That experience has made me much more sensitive and smart about what to dig into and what should I steer clear of. Mind you that when I talked about this on another witch forum, I got kind of rejected by some people which I really hope wont happen in here? I don't think it will as people here seem to be a lot more tolerant and nice than on the other forum. :)

Last spring was a turbulent time for me, lot of things changed. I lost my job, found out about having a birth defect i my carpal tunnels which made me rethink work and other things, luckily that will be fixed with a surgery, I wish I know how soon. My girlfriend left me back then, I'm very thankful she did as that relationship was in a dead end for a long time. Soon after I found(Actually she found me.) a girl who I think is the love of my life, the perfect match. I couldn't be happier about it. And then having so much time to be alone and think of things, I felt a strong urge to get back into meditation....

And then one night it hit me! I was mediating and just emptying my mind and by chance I asked for guidance about where I should go in a spiritual sense. I rarely have visions when I'm meditating, but that time was crazy. I felt as if I'm floating in a soft white mist of sorts and I had a vision of this perfectly beautiful godlike woman who I now think was a deity, which one, that I don't know, but I think it was THE Goddess. It was just a quick flash along with came a strong suggestion that I have to become a witch, that it is my destiny to be one and that I should start to practice and study the thing. It didn't come as words in my mind, but more like a very strong feeling.

I haven't had many of these "wake up calls" in my life, once or maybe twice before. It was way beyond normal meditation, it was a religious experience. Never before have I had a vision of something I could call a deity before and it made a huge impact on me, I still remember it as if it just happened.

Soon I started to read about Wicca and witchcraft in general. I like many aspects of Wicca, but I don't feel like its my path as it is, I'm not much into organised religion in general and I don't know anybody around my area who's into this stuff. If there is a coven here, I do not know about it. So for now I'm forced to be solitary practitioner. I would really like to get in touch with like minded people, but I think my only option at the moment is online. I have a friend who's a witch too, but he's on such a dark path (=Was my mentor years ago.) that I prefer to not speak of these matters with him any more. He taught me a lot though, I'm grateful for him, he taught me what not to do and which things to stay out of. This includes things we don't speak about in here so I wont go into details.

The other forum I mentioned, I don't visit them much and I don't write there any longer. The admin/owner of that site is a traditional Wicca and her attitude towards my eclectic thinking wasn't very nice. She's also a member in a coven and I think her idea is that you shouldn't poke around this unless you go the traditional way. (=You're not a witch without a coven.) I have never settled very well with rules, authority figures and set ways of doing things, I've always walked my own path in life, doing what my heart tells me instead of following a lead. This doesn't always seem to suit those with differing ideas which is bit sad. Although on this forum I sense totally different attitude, I really like it here. I just wish people would be more active, but I guess there's all the time in the world. :)

My experiences since spring have been very positive mostly. Amazing things have started to happen since I've started to ask guidance and help from certain deities, the most powerful chance being the Goddess of the moon. At the moment its Diana. (Damn, cold shivers from just typing that name!) Most spells and rituals I have done have had very positive impact on my life and almost everything has worked so far. The only thing that backfired was a money spell I did at one point, since then, I have been broke half of the time, having one setback after another hit me out of the blue. I don't know what went wrong, something obviously did. I don't think there's outside influence on this, probably my lack of experience or the haste on which I did that spell screwed it up. One thing I have taken note of is that it seems that my gift is to do spells to help others, every time I have tried to help a friend etc. by magickal means, it has come to pass just as I wanted it to happen. When ever I'm selfish the effect isn't that obvious or then it backfires. The more time passes, it seems that I'm getting more and more into helping others before myself and it feel like the right thing to do.

My Beltane ritual was amazing. I cast a circle in a forest nearby to a special place I have there, it was mostly about thanksgiving to the spirits and gods, I didn't do any specific spells. It was mind blowing, soon after casting my circle and summoning the ones who I pray to, I felt as if a big crowd was standing right outside my circle and I even heard footsteps around me, couldn't see anything with my eyes, but I certainly felt it. It was the first BIG ritual I did in that manner and it made totally clear that this is the thing I'm supposed to be doing and there's lot more to it that you wold think. The feeling afterwards was euphoric, I walked the way back home feeling so happy and energetic, I chanted something all the way, I don't even remember what it was, but I had to sing, it felt so good. Next year, I will try to follow the wheel more consistently, life has been on the way of this for months now.

Woaah... That's one long post, enough rambling for now, I'll get back into it later on.... Hmm, perhaps when the latest spells I've done come to pass. Hopefully. :flyingwitch:
By my feet the flowers of witchery abloom.
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Re: Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Mon Dec 10, 2018 7:14 am

I'm bored and I thought to open up a bit about my past... I'm in my mid thirties now and I've had a lot of time to reflect on my past and think about the future, I guess that kind of thing comes with ageing. :)

My childhood and youth was mostly happy time, but also very turbulent with huge problems. Bullying, problems in the family and my personal issues... All that has shaped my views a lot, in retrospect it has all been important. If I had my life any easier, I doubt I would be where I am now.

I was very young when I started to questiong Christianity for the first time. No doubt because of heavy metal, some of which preached about thinking yourself instead obeying the authority. Other lyrics spoke of occulted things, the devil and so on. I was so into it I started to translate the lyrics and get to understand what it is about. Then in mid to late nineties, black metal became a huge trend and of course I was totally sucked into it. When I was about fifteen I had interesting "double life" going on. I used to attend church stuff for youth and elsewhere I was into witchcraft and stuff with other kind of friends. I had a cross necklace on top of my shirt and below I had the pentagram. If the church folks knew about what I was interested into, they would have been terrified. It was already back in that time, when I also got into the dark side of witchcraft. It was all very innocent back then of course, no one knew much, everybody was just super excited and curious.

Things kept snowballing from there and soon I was in our folk metal band, which familiarised me with Finnish witchcraft. The kind of consensus in the metal scene back then was very anti christian and rebellious. On my 18th birthday I got out of the church. My mother was so mad at me. She accused me of being a devil worshipper which wasn't true at all. Thankfully I made it so that she sort of made peace with me and never bothered me about this since.

During my teens I got familiar with so many things that proven to be useful later. I got to know the main ideas of Wicca, which I revere to this day. (Three fold law and so on.) I managed to do telekinesis with my girlfriend of the time, first spells I ever did and so on. Also I got to know what NOT to do, mainly stuff which manipulated other people or caused harm to someone. Bad stuff which resulted in lot of fear and anxiety later on. But it was important experience to have. Live and learn.

Around the time I was 18 yo I grew separate from my witchy friends and my interests grew elsewhere... I "forgot" most witchcraft for years, but it somehow stuck to the back of my mind and often I though that I should be doing it. Somehow I just didn't feel it was the right time.

Then came the dark times. Between 2005 - 2009 was the craziest time in my life, friends, girls, bands, booze, drugs, you name it. Mostly usual twentysomething stuff. I have long periods of time back then of which I have very little recollection of. In late 2004 or early 2005 I met a guy who became one of my bandmates. He's a witch of some sort and soon he became my mentor. Nice guy, but he's into very dark kind of craft, and he taught me. I got deep in it. Needless to say, it didn't end up well. After several years of being on and off doing dark, some times outright evil things my mental health was in ruins. As were my arms, I look like a tiger with all the scars I have. I will not go into details about this as I want to abide by the rules of this forum and not speak too much of negative things. Even if it was allowed, I wouldn't want to. So I will keep this vague.

Around 2009 I reached a saturation point, too much alcohol, too much dark magick, too much everything.... I had enough. I got even suicidal, which isn't typical for me at all. I was very close of walking on the bridge in town and jumping to my death. But something made me avert that, stop and think what the hell am I doing with my life. The band mate who taught me all the nasty stuff was no longer with us, moved to another town so he wasn't there to keep me in it any more. I finally stopped and thought carefully on what the hell am I doing. I stopped. I stopped doing everything related to the craft.

In late 2009 I experienced some kind of spiritual awakening, that was the time when I got into meditation... I was very busy trying to work on my mental issues and dark past, I wanted to make up for my mistakes and get on to a more positive path in life. In about two years I had cleared a lot of the nasty things of my past, I was very much into meditation and doing some simple magick again, this time only good things, do what thou wilt, but harm none was my idea back then.(And it still is!)

Things took their time again, I got in and out of actually doing stuff, for some period I "forgot" about everything again and then got back into it... Few years ago I started doing some ritual magick, mainly based on our folk tradition, specially during mid summer celebrations. I was doing things on and off.

Early this year things changed again. I had lost my job some months prior, which was a good thing as I suffer from carpal tunnel syndrome, I couldn't keep doing it much longer anyway. Being unemployed I again had all the time in the world.... And the rest I don't need to repeat as I've been around here since. The vision of the Goddess I had during a meditation this spring was the wake up call to get back on it and I've never been this serious about the Craft. And it feels absolutely right, I think I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing.

Funny little change I have taken note of, before I used to do quite selfish magick, almost every time trying to improve my own life. But as time goes on, I have noticed that the more I do this, more and more I'm trying to help others before myself. This has not been a conscious choice. It just seems that this is the way to go. Perhaps its my path to become a healer, the kind of witch people come to when they need help? Maybe. That would be fitting as that's what my people did before there were doctors and hospitals. They were called fol healers here, but what they did was mostly witchcraft. Maybe it is my destiny to become one, who knows. Time will tell.
By my feet the flowers of witchery abloom.
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Re: Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Mon Dec 10, 2018 7:22 am

I thought to add that I wish that no one here would judge me for my past. I have some bad experience talking about it this openly and I considered a while if I should say anything or not. So it is my wish that please, don't get scared, please don't judge for what has been, but for what is now. :D
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Re: Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Mon Dec 10, 2018 8:48 am

I have been reading a lot about love spells.

I have never done kind of love spell people keep asking for all the time. I share the view that trying to sort of force it is just plain wrong and it probably backfires badly.

But attracting love into ones life or strengthening the existing bonds is what I've done several times with fantastic results. How much of my luck I contribute to the spells I did, I cannot say, but none of it has made any harm, quite the opposite. Perhaps doing these have just boosted my confidence and will to have a love life I wish for.

So here's a spell I did, its intended for solidifying the love between you and your love.

Ingredients:
Athame
A chalice or cauldron
Water
Salt
One white candle
One red candle
Piece of paper
A red or pink pen
Your favourite anointing oil

Write the full name of your love on the paper. Below it, write down your spell, the things you want from your relationship and what you want to improve. Make it rhyme if you can, I prefer improvising and making the words come in the moment. I think its good for this to be personal with the words you feel are the appropriate and powerful. Draw a invoking pentagram below the spell, you may want to highlight your own element and or your lovers element. Fold the paper three times in a way that the spell is inside and draw two more invoking pentagrams on each side the same way you made the first.

Purify the ingredients in your preferred method. Cast a circle and a large invoking pentagram in the same manner as on the spell you wrote. Carve the name of your love on the red candle using your now purified athame, from bottom up, four times, one on each direction/element. Then draw four invoking pentagrams between the names you carved and one in the bottom of the candle. Mix the salt and water in your chalice or cauldron and light the white candle. Anoint the red candle with the saltwater on four sides, then with the flame of the white candle, then with "air", you can blow on the sides of the candle or take it outside if its windy. Then anoint the candle with your favourite oil. You can chant your spell while doing this and ask for your deity(/ies) to your aid.

Then light the red candle and place your spell below it. Meditate on your spell coming true and those wonderful things you asked to come to pass. Let the candle burn out in one go. When the candle is burned, bury the remaining wax along with your spell to your favourite place. That's it.
By my feet the flowers of witchery abloom.
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Re: Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Mon Dec 10, 2018 10:17 am

I can't wait.
Recently I happened to break the lace I had for my not so special pentagram I wear and decided that its a time to get a new one. I found very nice silver pentagram which has a crescent moon below it. It hit me right there that this is the one I want, so I ordered it. It should arrive today in about two hours... Anticipation is killing me.

On the next full moon, I will do a "baptism" for it, I just need to find the right spell for cleansing and charging it. Funnily enough, this coincided with finding a new deity for myself. I've thought for the longest time to get a necklace with the moon on it and this one is just perfect. I'll post a picture when I get it.
By my feet the flowers of witchery abloom.
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Re: Path of the Hex

Postby L.J.Hex » Mon Dec 10, 2018 5:08 pm

I knew it. The post screwed up and my parcel will be delayed for day or two. I had a hunch about it and I was correct.

Some times I wish my gut feeling would tell me about good things. Almost every time I get a "hunch", its about something bad and its pretty much spot on right. And its way too random. I'm envious of those who have it spot on all the time. Although, maybe it would make life boring to "know" too many things in advance...

My half brothers grandmother(Bless that fine lady, I only met her once before she died.) was an interesting person. She was totally clairvoyant about everything in her life, nothing surprised her. You could go visit her without calling her and she would have coffee ready as you arrive... She was also very religious and thought that her gift was devils work. She never talked about it much, but there was no way to surprise her with anything.

I think a gift like that is a blessing and a curse in same package.
By my feet the flowers of witchery abloom.
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L.J.Hex
 
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