I'd like to ask you
something very private.
My problem is that my whole life I liked girls. But
suddenly I fell deeply in love with a guy (he was my friend in school).
I don't know what is happening with me. Sometimes I think that someone
was doing magic on me. Now I'm in love with a beautiful girl and also
with this guy. I'm so sad that I don't know what to do. Does a spell
exist that can make me straight? Or a spell to make him love me, because
I'm so sad and it's hard for me.
Please if you can help me...
I don't have any spells to help you with this, but I want
you to know that recent research shows that a person's sexuality falls
on a continuum. What you're feeling is perfectly normal. And just
because someone doesn't feel the same way for you doesn't mean anything
really. That happens to everyone I've known. I've gone through it
several times, most especially in my teenage years when I would get
serious crushes on boys. Then, when I was in my early twenties, I had a
serious crush on a girl and ended up making out with her. Then I went
back to guys after that. A lot of people do that and it's normal. I've thought about taking on a lesbian lover again and living
life as a gay person. It's really no big deal these days. Just do
whatever you feel good about at the time. You can always change your
mind later if you wish.
Read this information from
the Kinsey Institute.
I copied this from:
0 - Exclusively heterosexual with no homosexual
1 - Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual
2 - Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual
3 - Equally heterosexual and homosexual
4 - Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual
5 - Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual
6 - Exclusively homosexual
What is "The Kinsey Scale?"
The Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale, sometimes referred to as
the “Kinsey Scale,” was developed by Alfred Kinsey and his
colleagues Wardell Pomeroy and Clyde Martin in 1948, in order to
account for research findings that showed people did not fit into
neat and exclusive heterosexual or homosexual categories.
Interviewing people about their sexual histories, the Kinsey team
found that, for many people, sexual behavior, thoughts and feelings
towards the same or opposite sex was not always consistent across
time. Though the majority of men and women reported being
exclusively heterosexual, and a percentage reported exclusively
homosexual behavior and attractions, many individuals disclosed
behaviors or thoughts somewhere in between.
As Kinsey writes in Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948):
“Males do not represent two discrete populations, heterosexual and
homosexual. The world is not to be divided into sheep and goats…The
living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects."
The authors add in Sexual Behavior of the Human Female (1953):
“It is a characteristic of the human mind that tries to dichotomize
in its classification of phenomena….Sexual behavior is either normal
or abnormal, socially acceptable or unacceptable, heterosexual or
homosexual; and many persons do not want to believe that there are
gradations in these matters from one to the other extreme.”
Kinsey also reported:
“While emphasizing the continuity of the gradations between
exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual histories, it
has seemed desirable to develop some sort of classification which
could be based on the relative amounts of heterosexual and
homosexual experience or response in each history... An individual
may be assigned a position on this scale, for each period in his
life.... A seven-point scale comes nearer to showing the many
gradations that actually exist.” (pp. 639, 656).
I hope this helps you feel
better and to know that your feelings are perfectly natural.
Thank you very much. You really helped me. At one time I
thought that it would be better to kill myself because I don't want to
be gay or bisexual, but now like you say I will let things figure
themselves out in time. Again, thanks a lot.